


Shattered Pieces

by HPfanonezillion



Category: Hunger Games Trilogy - Suzanne Collins
Genre: Angst, Children, F/M, Family, Fluff, Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-17
Updated: 2015-05-15
Packaged: 2018-03-23 08:16:36
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 19
Words: 35,307
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3761194
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HPfanonezillion/pseuds/HPfanonezillion
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Katniss and Peeta struggle with life and with each other as they work to start their family.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

"Peeta!" Katniss screamed as she sat up. She panted.

Peeta sat up beside her. "Hey." He said gently, putting his arms around her. "It's just a dream, sweetheart."

She turned and put her head on his shoulder. "It feels like they're getting worse." She breathed. "I was back there. Back in the Games. Clove, Cato, Marvel, all of them. And you." She sat back breathed a large sigh as she wiped her face. "You let them take me and torture me. And you just stood there. You let them hurt me. And I kept begging for your help and you did nothing." She got up out of the bed.

"Where are you going?"

"I'm not getting back to sleep anytime soon." She left the room.

Peeta followed a few seconds later. "I'll make you some tea." He pushed her gently into a chair and walked over to the stove.

"You're limping." She observed.

"I always limp."

"More than usual."

He put the kettle on the stove and then sat down beside her. He picked up her hand and kissed it. "My leg's bothering me a little."

"Anything I can do?"

"I don't think so. But I've had the same prosthesis since they pulled me out. Maybe I need an upgrade or something." He kissed her hand again. "It's been making some noise. Clicking and squeaking."

"We'd have to go to the Capitol if you want quality."

"Are you up for that?" he asked softly.

"I'm fine. I can avoid my mother."

"You really shouldn't."

"No, I shouldn't. But we always fight when we're together."

"You're both still so hurt…"

She lifted her hand and ran it through his hair. "I know you don't understand it, Peeta, but she's let me down so many times."

"Mine did, too." He stood up and started pulling out cups and gathering the rest of the tea things. "I'd give anything to have her back, though." He admitted softly.

Katniss walked over behind him and wrapped her arms around him. She dropped her head on his shoulder. "I'm sorry."

He rested his hands on top of hers and leaned back. "We're so messed up, Katniss. Maybe you're right about the baby."

"You know I am." She turned her head and kissed his neck. "But that doesn't matter. You want to be a father and I owe it to you to try."

"You don't owe me anything, sweetheart. You've saved me so many times. In so many ways." He turned and leaned his forehead against hers. "I would be nothing without you."

"And I would be nothing without you."

"You love me. Real or not real?"

She smiled, "Real." She kissed him softly. "Very real." She looked around him. "You didn't put the tea in the water yet, have you?"

"Not yet. Why?"

She stepped back and slipped her hand in his. She pulled him back toward their room. "I have a sudden urge to go back to bed."

"Oh?" He asked.

She said nothing else. As soon as her feet stepped over the threshold of their room, she started shedding her clothes.

Peeta followed suit, hopping a little on his good leg and he struggled out of his pants. He pulled Katniss close and kissed her softly. His hands moved slowly over her back.

Katniss blinked, looking deeply into his eyes. "I'm so scared. Every time is so frightening."

"I know." His voice shook. "We can use all the precautions. We don't have to try tonight."

"No, I…" She stepped away and pulled him with her to the bed. "I promised you we'd try."

He sat down and started messing with his false leg. "Would it bother you if I took this thing off?"

"Why would it bother me? You go without it all the time." She reached over and helped him remove it. "And maybe I have some weird fetish." She smiled and kissed him softly and pushed him back on the bed. "I like you better without the leg."

"Not real." He said with a smile. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her down on top of him. "You love everything about me." He moved his hands over her smooth skin. "Real or not real?"

"Real." She said softly, kissing him and moving her hand slowly down his chest. "Very, very real."

* * *

Katniss walked in through the front door. She sat her bow and quiver down against the wall and then walked further into the house. "Peeta?"

"In the kitchen." He called.

She smelled tea and fresh bread as she walked in. She shared a kiss with her husband beside the stove as he worked on making scrambled eggs.

"Have a good hunt?" He asked.

She lifted the bag. "A few squirrels. Couple different birds. I saw a deer, but thought better of it." She smiled and put the bag down beside the back door. "How does that leg feel this morning?"

"My leg is fine. Just like the last few mornings when you've asked." He turned around and sat the pan of eggs on the table. "There's another part of me that could use your attention." He teased.

She chuckled. "You're so much different these days."

"Well, sweetheart, sometimes I just feel like life is too short to be serious. You're serious enough for the two of us. And all this lovemaking over the last few weeks—" He stopped suddenly. His hands shook as he gripped the plate of bread. He closed his eyes and breathed deeply.

Katniss stood uncertainly, watching him. She knew if she tried to say something, it could only make things worse. So she waited and watched and he eventually relaxed. She walked over and took the plate gently from his hands.

Peeta swallowed and let out a long breath. "I'm fine." He said softly. He opened his eyes slowly. "You aren't a threat to me. Real or not real?"

"Real." She said softly.

"And I won't hurt you." He looked around him, remembering all he'd been doing. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be." She pulled out a chair and helped him to sit. "Eat something." She leaned down and kissed his cheek softly.

He stiffened at the brush of her lips against his skin.

It shouldn't hurt her. But it still did. Just before she had gone out to hunt, his body had melted at the touch of her lips. How would they ever have the family Peeta wanted when they both ran so hot and cold?

They ate in silence. Katniss watched him critically. Peeta kept his head down.

"Stop it, Katniss." He stood up suddenly.

"Stop what?" She looked down at her plate guiltily.

"You're waiting for me to attack you." He started clearing the table.

"Maybe I am." She was growing angry now.

"And you're thinking about what we'll tell our kids when it happens and they see."

"I'm contemplating something along the lines of, 'Don't worry, Daddy just wants to rip Mother's throat out. But it's all right, kids, he'll never _really_ do it. Maybe.'" She shot up from the table and stalked off to the other room.

She heard a plate clatter to the floor and Peeta mutter something. Then she heard him stomping after her.

"I'm better." He said desperately from the doorway.

Katniss looked up at him. "Excuse me?"

He walked over and sat down beside her on the sofa. "I'm so much better."

"You still want to kill me. Real or not real?"

He bit his lip and looked past her. He was quiet for a long time. He finally said softly, "Not real."

She shot up from the sofa. "That's a lie."

"It's not a lie, sweetheart." He said just above a whisper. " _I_ don't want to kill you. I never wanted you dead. Snow did. He did terrible things to all of us." He shook his head. "But there's no more Snow."

"Just your lingering desire to kill me every so often." She walked toward the door.

"Where are you going?" he asked almost frantically.

"I just need to be outside. The walls are closing in." She slammed the door shut behind her.

She walked out into the forest and found the spot between the rocks where she used to meet Gale. How she wished she could just go back to those days. She was barely surviving, but at least she was almost happy and knew what was what. She never wanted to have a family with Gale, but it never mattered. She had her family.

She had Prim.

She put her face in her hands. She breathed and listened to the sounds of the forest. A bird sang in a tree nearby. A squirrel scurried through the brush. A twig snapped.

Katniss shot up into a defensive crouch. Why hadn't she brought her bow?

"Whoa." Peeta said softly, putting his hands out. "It's just me."

"Is it really?" She said, even as she sat back down.

He sat beside her.

After a long silence, she said, "I'm sorry. It's just always so uncertain. That's why I go back and forth with this. We can go for days and everything is fine. And then the universe seems to realize that something's wrong and I have a nightmare and you feel like killing me…" She shook her head.

"You haven't had a nightmare in weeks."

"I know." She slipped her hand into his and gently squeezed it. She struggled with herself before finally saying, "I've been trying to ignore this."

"Ignore what, Katniss?"

She looked at him. "You love me. Real or not real?"

"Real." He said, looking back at her in confusion.

"You understand why this is hard for me. Real or not real?"

"Real." He said, starting to understand.

"Peeta, I…"

He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close. "I know, sweetheart." He kissed her. "I know. We'll get ourselves used to the idea. We've got a few months, right?"

"Yeah, about seven of them." She said softly against his chest.

"Seven? Really?"

"Yeah." She sat back. "We should get you to the Capitol sooner rather than later. I don't want to make that trip..." She stuck her hands out in front of her stomach in an exaggeration of a pregnant belly.

He chuckled. He put his hand on her stomach. "I can't wait to see you like that." He kissed her neck. He kissed a line up to just under her ear.

She moved away. "Don't do that here." She said softly.

He nodded. "Let's get home, then." He struggled to stand.

Katniss stood and helped him.

There was an odd popping sound. "I'm really going to need to get this fixed."

"Lean on me." She said, wrapping her arm around his waist.

They made slow progress back to their house, Peeta's leg popping and clicking the entire way.


	2. Chapter 2

Peeta walked up the stairs to his room. It was slow going on one leg with a crutch. Katniss had been experiencing debilitating nausea lately. She wasn't even able to eat much. Peeta balanced a glass of tea on a plate as he stumbled up the stairs.

"I can just spend the next couple months on the couch, Peeta." She said as she pushed herself up and took the cup from him. "Especially now that your leg is out of commission."

"The bed is more comfortable." He said. "And I can get around just fine." He leaned over and kissed her forehead. He spread his hand over her stomach "How do you feel?"

"Fine." She pushed his hand away. "As fine as I can be. Hazelle stopped by this morning. She said it's normal."

"And she would know as well as anyone, wouldn't she?" He put his hand on her stomach again.

"Peeta." She scolded.

"What's wrong with me touching you?"

"It's where you're touching me." She complained.

"Well, this baby will be here in a few months, like it or not."

"I don't."

He moved his hand away like it had been burnt.

"And now you're upset." Katniss put the tea cup on the night stand and rolled away. "I can't do this, Peeta. I know I have to, but I don't know how."

He looked at her for a long time. He put the crutch on the ground and then stretched out on the bed behind her. "Have you talked with Annie or Gale?"

"Yeah." She said softly. She sniffed. "It hasn't helped."

"What will help?"

"Not being pregnant." She replied in a low whisper.

Peeta was silent. He just held her.

"Say something." She demanded.

"If that's what you really want…"

"Don't. I could never do that. I may not want this, but I'm not going to get rid of it." She rolled over in his arms. "And you would hate me if I did that." She kissed him. "Sometimes, when I'm not too nauseated to move, I'm happy about it. And I _know_ you're happy. You've told everyone who would stop long enough. Some people you've told three times and they just smile at you and nod. Haymitch said he's getting tired of you talking about it so much." She smiled. "He told me it was almost enough to make him start drinking again."

Peeta laughed, "He'd never hear the end of that from Hazelle."

"Nope." She took a deep breath. "I'm tired of being in this bed all the time."

"Well, you seem to be doing better these last couple days."

"I have been. Maybe if I eat something…"

"Want me to bring you something?"

"And have you fall down the stairs and make a mess? No thank you." She pushed herself up and sat there for several seconds. She smiled and swung her feet off the side of the bed. She sat there again and waited. When nothing happened, she stood and made her way to the door. "You're not going to force me to cook for myself in my fragile state, are you?"

Peeta laughed, "Fragile? When have you ever been fragile?" He followed her out into the hall. Then made their way slowly down the stairs, leaning on each other.

There was a knock on the front door as they both stepped onto the main floor. Katniss went to answer it while Peeta turned toward the kitchen.

"Posy. Hi." She said cheerfully to Gale's sister. "Please come in."

She stepped inside the door. "I just stopped by to see if you were feeling up to joining us for supper. Mother is making plenty. Though with Haymitch, that doesn't always mean much." She laughed.

"Not at all. Especially since he stopped drinking." Katniss joked. "Let me ask Peeta. Come on in." She walked to the other end of the house.

"You need to get well enough to hunt, sweetheart. There is not a damn thing in this house worth eating." He straightened up from the refrigerator. "Oh, hey, Posy."

"Hazelle sent Posy to invite us to supper." Katniss explained.

"Thank God." Peeta said. "Yes!"

Posy laughed. "Okay, I'll go over and tell her."

"Tell them we'll be right over." Katniss said.

"Will do." She skipped out the front door.

"Hazelle and Posy have been so good for Haymitch." She said as soon as the door closed.

"They have. Imagine him falling in love with her."

"Him falling in love with _anyone_." She said with a laugh. "And not his alcohol." She stood for a few seconds. "I _think_ I'm good." She walked up the stairs. "I'll be right back down."

"Take your time, sweetheart." He called.

A few minutes later, Katniss and Peeta made their way across the street to Haymitch's house. Peeta held her hand. She looked slightly green but swore she was fine for the moment.

"You're here." Haymitch said flatly when he answered the door. "Well, I guess you should come in." He stepped to the side and motioned for them to enter. He had a smile pulling at the corners of his mouth. "Hazelle is fattening me up." He said as he led them into the dining room.

"Just getting you healthy again." She commented as they came into the room. "Posy, please bring the chicken in."

"Yes, Mother." She said and walked into the kitchen.

Hazelle examined Katniss. "You okay, Katniss?" She asked softly.

"Fine." She lied.

Posy came back in with the chicken. The scent hit Katniss like a wave. She clapped her hand over her mouth and turned on her heel and ran from the room.

"Katniss." Peeta called as he turned and started to go after her.

Hazelle put a hand on his shoulder. "I'll go." She followed.

Katniss sat on the front steps with her head on her knees. "I'm sorry." She looked up. "Hazelle, tell me it doesn't last forever."

She smiled and sat down beside her. "It doesn't." She put an arm across her shoulders.

"I was mostly fine until the chicken walked through the door." She leaned her head on Hazelle's shoulder. She was quiet for a while before saying, "You're more like my mother than my own."

"You mother loves you, Katniss. She just has trouble showing it."

"Your husband died in that explosion, too. How did you go on?"

"I had my boys. And Posy on the way. I couldn't afford to do anything to endanger them. My husband would never have liked it."

"But Mother almost let us starve."

"You never would have let that happen. I knew from the moment I met you that you were a strong one." She turned her head and kissed Katniss's forehead. "I knew when you volunteered for Prim that you would do everything in your power to make it back here. And I know that you'll get through this."

She sat up. "Thank you." She said softly. She stood. "I'm going to try again."

Hazelle stood beside her. "Good."

They walked into the house. Rory and Vick were taking their places at the table as they came back in. Katniss stood in the doorway for a few seconds before she took her seat beside Peeta.

Hazelle said, "Start without me." She squeezed Haymitch's shoulder as she walked past him into the kitchen.

They hesitated only a second before the men all dug in. Posy and Katniss watched them, exchanging amused looks. Hazelle came back in just as Katniss put a few small things on her plate. She sat a steaming cup down beside her.

"This tea should help." She said softly. "I'll give you some to take home. I should have given it to you earlier."

"Thank you, Hazelle." She said, sitting back and sipping the tea.

"And now that we have that settled…" Haymitch said, giving Hazelle a significant look.

"Oh, we're actually telling them that?" She said with a smile.

"Telling us what?" Vick asked.

"You finally asked, didn't you?" Peeta asked Haymitch.

"Asked what?" Rory demanded.

"Well, it was more of her demanding. 'Marry me or I stop cooking for you.' I couldn't refuse that one." Haymitch said. He looked around the table at everyone.

The boys both put down their forks and stared daggers at their mother's new fiancé. Posy shot up from her seat and ran squealing to throw her arms around the both of them. Katniss and Peeta just sat and watched it all.

Katniss asked after Posy took her seat, "Have you told Gale yet?"

"Not yet." Hazelle smiled. "We'll call them later."

Haymitch brought the woman's hand to his lips and kissed it. It was the most affection anyone had ever seen him give, though Peeta had noticed the tender looks he sent her way when he thought no one was watching.

Vick cautioned, "I'm watching you, Abernathy."

Haymitch smiled, "I assure you, Vick, if I hurt your mother in any way, I know I'd regret it. And not just because I know you and your brothers will kick my ass." He pointed Katniss's way. "She'll shoot me where I stand."

"Just so you know." Rory warned. He picked up his fork and looked back down at his plate. A smile played on his lips.

Vick stared him down for the rest of the meal.

* * *

"Can you believe that?" Peeta asked as he settled into bed beside Katniss that night.

"I can. They've been sweet on each other for a while." She snuggled into his side.

"You seem to be feeling better." He wrapped his arms around her and kissed the top of her head.

"I _do_ feel better." She turned her head and kissed his shoulder. "That tea is magic."

"Magic, huh?" He turned. "You feeling up to some, uh…?" He kissed her. It suggested a lot more than the soft, sweet kisses he'd given her the last several days.

She smiled when he pulled away. "Are _you_ up for it?"

"I always am." He kissed her again, rolling on top of her.

They simply kissed for a while. Peeta's hands started moving over her slowly. Her hands tangled in his hair, holding his face close to hers as he pushed at her clothes. He rested his hand on her stomach and looked down at her.

"I'm sorry about what I said earlier." She said softly. "About not wanting to be pregnant."

"Don't apologize, sweetheart. I understand. Not entirely, but I do." He kissed her softly.

He sat back and pulled off his shirt. He pulled on her and relieved her of the rest of her clothes. He rolled onto his back and tugged her down on top of him.

"You okay?" He asked softly.

She nodded. She kissed him again and moved over him. "Are you?"

"Perfect." He slid his hands from her waist up her side and cupped her breasts. "I love you."

She smiled. "I love you, too."

They started moving together, kissing again and again. Katniss lifted Peeta's hands above his head, threading their fingers together. She kissed him deeply. She sat back, running her hands down his arms and resting on his chest.

He said her name over and over as he watched her moving over him. His hands rested on her hips. She answered with a soft moan. And with a few more gentle strokes, they both met their release.

Katniss collapsed on his chest. He stroked her hair, working to regain his breathing.

"I love you, Peeta." She panted into his chest. "So much."

"I love you just as much." He answered.

They lay in silence for a long time. He kissed the top of her head.

She kissed his chest and rolled away. "I forget how much I enjoy that."

He chuckled. "I don't. But I love you more than sex."

She laughed. "I'll accept that compliment." She turned her head. "I love you. Sometimes I'm just so…It hits me like a truck." She slipped her hand into his. "I know you're always there, but I take you for granted. I'm sorry."

"Why are you talking like this? My Katniss isn't so emotional."

"Yeah, well, _your_ Katniss is having _your_ baby and I'm starting to get emotional because of it." She rolled into his side. "She's also exhausted. Goodnight."

He chuckled. "Goodnight, sweetheart." He kissed her forehead. "I love you."

She sighed and pressed her eyes into his shoulder. "Me too."


	3. Chapter 3

Katniss rolled out of bed early a few mornings later. She started gathering her hunting clothes.

Peeta rolled over and reached out for her. "Katniss?" He squinted an eye open. "Hey. Going hunting?"

"Yeah." She climbed over and kissed his cheek. "I'll be back in a few hours."

"Okay." He rolled back over. "Be careful."

"I will." She went down the stairs and made herself a cup of the tea Hazelle had given her. It was really helpful and she was now feeling like she could regain her normal life. For a while, at least. She picked up her bow, quiver, and game bag by the back door. She walked into the office and scribbled a quick note to Peeta. " _Remember to pick up some more sugar when you go to the market today._ " She stuck it to the refrigerator and hurried out the back door.

She got two birds right off. They flew right in front of her when she stepped on a hidden twig. She picked them up and stuffed them in her game bag. She stalked through the forest, trying to be a little quieter this time around. She was checking on a snare when a squirrel scurried past her. She got it. And the snare held a rabbit. She reset it and then took the rabbits out of all the other snares and reset them.

As she was getting up from a crouch, she got lightheaded. She grabbed onto a tree to steady herself.

"Must have stood up too fast." She muttered to herself. She picked up her bag and headed out of the forest.

She stepped through the back door and set her things down. She walked over to the refrigerator to see her note had been replaced by one from Peeta.

" _I'll remember, sweetheart. I'm going to the bakery for a while to help with some final touches. Be back for lunch. There are fresh rolls in the oven. Love you!_ "

She smiled and took a roll out of the oven. She broke off a piece and placed it on her tongue. "Mm." she groaned and then stuffed even more in her mouth. She walked up the stairs, shedding her clothes as she went. She finished her roll as she turned on the shower to heat up.

She put a hand on her stomach as she felt a pain shoot through her abdomen. She stood still for a minute, but the pain didn't come back. She shrugged and continued with her shower.

The phone was ringing as she came back down the stairs. "Peeta, are you home yet?" She called. But there was no answer. She hurried to answer the phone.

"Hello."

"Why the hell didn't you tell me my mother was marrying Haymitch when I talked to you last night?" Gale demanded.

"I'm sorry, I didn't think it was my place and she said she wanted to tell you when she felt the time was right." She sat down on the sofa and stretched her legs out. "I take it you don't like the idea."

"I don't _dislike_ it. But, my god, Katniss. My mom is getting married. To Haymitch Abernathy. She'll be Hazelle Abernathy."

She laughed, "I'm sorry. I thought some of the same things. But he really does care for her. And they treat each other well."

"Good to know. So you think it's fine?"

"It's perfectly fine. How is your vacation?"

"Going well. Maggie is her mother's daughter. She loves the sea."

Katniss chuckled, "That's good. I'm going to hope this one likes to hunt. I don't know what I'd do if she preferred long division or something. I guess she can bake with Peeta and I'll be okay with that."

Gale laughed. "So you're hoping for a girl?"

"I'm hoping for a healthy baby that doesn't have to worry about anything."

"And it won't."

"I know, but—" she stopped speaking as another pain hit her. This one felt different. She looked down and saw blood. "Gale, something's wrong."

"What do you mean something's wrong?"

"I'm bleeding. And I feel weird. I think I'm losing my baby."

"Can you make it across the street to Mother?"

"I don't know." She stood. "Oh, god, Gale. There's so much. I don't know what's happening."

"I'm calling my mother. You sit tight."

The line went dead. Katniss stood there for a while. She was lightheaded and the pain had returned. The phone dropped from her hand and she stumbled toward the front door. She threw it open and started across the street. She was caught up by a pair of arms.

"Whoa there, sweetheart" Haymitch said. "Hazelle is on her way. He carried her back into the house and brought her up to her bedroom.

"Peeta." She said. "I need you to get him. He's at the bakery"

"I will. Once Hazelle gets here." He assured her.

Hazelle appeared in the door a few seconds later and Haymitch left to find Peeta

Hazelle stayed until Peeta returned. She said there wasn't anything to be done. Just let it all happen. She helped Katniss change. She bundled her up in bed and told her that if she felt cold or developed a fever it could be something dangerous.

"I'm so sorry this happened to you, Katniss." She said softly, smoothing her hair back from her head.

"Could I get pregnant again?"

"Yes. But you need to let your body get better. Give it a few months before you try again."

She nodded. "Has this ever happened to you?"

"Yes. Before Posy was born. And it took a while before I was able to conceive again. That's why there was such a big gap between her and Vick."

Peeta hobbled in. "Katniss?"

At the sight of her husband, Katniss broke down. "I'm so sorry. I'm so, so sorry." She sobbed as he held her.

"Sh. It's okay. I'm here. It's okay." He soothed.

She continued to cry on his shoulder. He knew this was difficult for her. He'd never seen her like this. Even when she had her worst nightmares, she never broke down like this. She sat back and wiped at her eyes. Her lip still trembled. "I'm sorry." She said again.

"Don't do that." He said softly, smoothing a hand over her hair. "It's not your fault."

"But I didn't want this."

"I know you didn't. But that doesn't mean it caused this."

She wrapped her arms around him again. "Don't leave me, Peeta."

"I won't, Katniss. I'm right here."

Hazelle said from the door. "You need to rest. I'll bring over food for the both of you. Remember what I said about fever and chills, Katniss."

"Yes, ma'am." She said softly.

"Get better." Haymitch said awkwardly from behind her as they turned to leave.

Peeta moved to lie beside her. They didn't speak for a long time. Katniss continued to sniff and hiccup. He ran his fingers through her hair and down her arm.

"It's okay." He whispered over and over like a mantra.

After a while, she went completely quiet. She said softly, "There's game to clean."

"I'll get it."

"Don't mess it up." She said dully.

"I won't, sweetheart." He kissed her forehead. "Just rest like Hazelle said."

"We'll get to the Capitol to get your new leg soon."

"Just rest for now. I'm getting around well enough."

"But you already made your appointment."

"You don't need to worry, sweetheart. I'll call them." He said softly. He kissed her softly.

She pressed her face into his shoulder. She clung to him. After a while, her grip loosened as she dozed off.

Peeta stayed a while until she was certain she was all right. He went downstairs and saw that Hazelle had left a note in the middle of the table that she put some food in the refrigerator for later and had cleaned up in the study as best she could.

Peeta went to the study and saw the couch was missing a cushion and the rug was missing. He contemplated the implications of that for a while. The phone rang, pulling him out of his thoughts. He picked it up.

"Hello?" he asked tentatively.

"Peeta, hi. It's Gale."

"Gale."

"Is Katniss okay?"

"Katniss? How…"

"We were talking when…I'm sorry."

"I…We…" He sat down on the end of the couch. "You called your mother. Thank you."

"I didn't know what else to do. I feel helpless."

"You're not the only one."

"Well, Annie and I send our best." He said awkwardly.

"Thank you. And congratulations about your new stepfather." Peeta said wryly.

Gale laughed. "Yeah. Thanks. I guess."

"Don't worry, Katniss and I can keep a good eye out. And Posy still lives at home and I can see she's just as strong-willed as the rest of you. Your mother will be all right."

A scream from the bedroom cut into their conversation.

"What was that?" Gale asked.

"Katniss. I have to go." Peeta hung up the phone without listening for a response.

She was lying on her back with her hands covering her face. She mumbled to herself over and over, but Peeta didn't catch it. He sat down beside her and pulled her hands away.

"Hey. You okay."

She looked at him for a while before he nodded. "Yeah."

"Gale called. He was worried."

"I was on the phone with him…" She sighed. "I dreamed I had a baby, but it had Snow's face."

"Snow's face? That what made you scream?"

"No. The dream changed and I saw Prim die. I killed her with an arrow." She closed her eyes. "I'm tired of these dreams."

"I know." He said softly. "I am too."

"It's all my fault. Everything."

"Sweetheart—"

"It is, Peeta. It is. If I hadn't…It all started when I volunteered for her. From that first moment, I defied what they wanted. And I became the Mockingjay. And because of me, so many people died. My sister died. Your family died."

"But life is better for everyone now, Katniss."

"Better for them. But not for us." She rolled over. "I want to be alone for a while."

Peeta struggled for a moment, but he stood. "I'll be right downstairs if you need anything." He started clumsily cleaning the game Katniss had brought in earlier.


	4. Chapter 4

Katniss rolled over in bed. She'd been staring at the ceiling for hours, waiting for Peeta to come join her so she could wrap her arms around him. But he had still not come in. She got up and went in search of him.

She found him in the living room, sitting on the couch, clutching his crutch and staring blankly at the far wall. She walked up behind him and slipped her hands down his chest.

He leaned his head back to look at her. He closed his eyes and accepted her kiss on his forehead.

"Why are you still up?" she asked softly.

"Thinking." He said simply, taking her hand and guiding her around to sit beside him. "How are you feeling?"

"Fine, I guess." She snuggled close to him. "I close my eyes and I see…blood. Everywhere."

"I'm sorry I wasn't here." He ran a thumb absently over a dent in his crutch.

"It's okay. You had things to do." She sighed. "How is the bakery coming along?"

"Almost finished. Just a few more final touches. Decorating. I think I want to paint a mural."

"That would be nice."

"But I don't know what of. I sat in my studio trying to think of something to sketch. Nothing came to me." He rested his head on top of hers. "I'm so lost today."

"I know. Me too. But you'll get inspiration when you're ready."

"I usually get inspiration when I can't do anything about it, oddly enough."

"Yeah."

They were quiet. Peeta combed his fingers through his wife's hair.

Katniss said after a while, "I think you should keep your appointment at the Capitol. You need that new leg. Maybe that will help. You always pain better when you can move around. And you're kind of hindered by the crutch."

"How do you know that? About me moving around when I paint?"

"I've snuck in to watch you a few times."

He chuckled. "Not really sneaking when I leave the door open." He kissed her forehead. "Are you sure about the trip?"

"Yeah. I'll even stay in bed until we go if you want me to."

"I would like that."

"Okay." She sat up. "Come up to bed?"

He nodded and got up to follow her.

The train car was far too extravagant. Every time they travelled, they got an entire car all to themselves, no matter how many times she had requested a simple cabin. Katniss didn't like it. She hated that they were still given special treatment for killing so many people.

Peeta never said anything, but she knew it bothered him too. He always stayed to one room for most of every trip they took. Katniss, on the other hand, wandered from one end of the train to another, hating being trapped inside.

But this trip, she curled up on the couch with Peeta and stayed put. He wrapped his arms around her. It was almost a week since the miscarriage and she was still recovering and trying to process everything. She broke into tears at random times. It was getting easier, but she still struggled.

It was late on the first night when Peeta kissed her temple and asked, "Ready for bed, sweetheart?"

"Just to sleep." She warned tiredly.

"I know." He pushed himself up off the couch and took a moment to balance himself before he held out his free hand to her.

She took it and followed.

"I'll be so glad when I have two legs again." He commented as he struggled to change.

"I will be too." She climbed onto bed. "At least one of us should be in proper working condition."

He smiled and hopped over to her with the help of the dresser. "You're in proper working condition."

She simply shook her head and rolled away.

"Hey, don't shut me out." He wrapped his arms around her. "You want to talk about it?"

"No. I just want to sleep."

"Okay. Goodnight."

"'Night."

But sleep didn't come quickly, like so often these last several nights. She laid awake thinking she was a failure in so many ways. She thought about all the things she couldn't change. And this night, as the train sped toward the Capitol, she thought about her mother.

She rolled over and watched Peeta sleep for a while. She thought about what he'd said about seeing his mother again. All she and her mother seemed to do when they were together was stare at each other. Or fight. Fight about things that were years in the past.

As she watched Peeta, she asked herself, would the reaction be the same as her mother's if she lost her own husband? Would she let her children risk starvation because the man she loved died? Was that man's life worth more than the life they created together?

Once again, the tears came. She rolled away and pressed her face into her pillow as she cried herself to sleep, barely registering Peeta's arms tightening around her.

As always, they were given special accommodation just because of their names. Wherever they went, Katniss heard people whispering to their companions or children, "There goes the Mockingjay." or simply, "Katniss Everdeen."

She gripped Peeta's hand tighter and continued on, smiling kindly at those she passed. But it was forced. Peeta's wasn't. He always showed genuine kindness. It was just the type of person he was. No matter that sometimes the stress of being out in public sometimes triggered his attacks later on.

"I'm sorry for all the attention." He said as they sat down to supper at their favorite Capitol restaurant.

"Why are you apologizing?" she said a touch too harshly.

"Because you never like the attention. And I know that especially right now you would just like to hide away."

"I would, actually."

"So we stay in for the rest of our time here. I can go to my appointments on my own."

"No, I want to be there. If you want me there, that is. And I need to make it a point to see Mother while I'm here. I can't just keep myself hidden. People have already seen me." She covered his hand with hers. "People will think something is wrong if I suddenly disappear. And no doubt someone will probably wrangle us into an interview while we're in town."

They were quiet for a while. Katniss moved her fingers over the back of Peeta's hand. He turned his hand over and curled his fingers around hers.

"I really do love you." He said softly.

She smiled. "And I really do love you."

He kissed the back of her hand.

Someone snapped a picture.

Over the next few days, Peeta had appointments and, later, fittings for his new prosthesis. Katniss was in the room with him when she was allowed. Sometimes Peeta told her to go for a walk because she was twitchy from being in the same place for so long as they waited for something to be adjusted or put together.

When this happened, she roamed the halls of the hospital. She found herself returning again and again to the nursery. She stared through the glass at the babies all tightly bundled. A few proud parents and relatives came to gaze upon their new additions.

Katniss envied them. They were all so full of hope and pride and love. How could something so small bring on all those emotions? But she knew from Gale and Annie's love for their baby girl that it was possible.

She just didn't know if she was capable of feeling that way toward a child.

She headed back toward Peeta's direction. His appointment would be done soon. She ran into her mother.

"I heard you were here." Mrs. Everdeen said in surprise.

"Yeah. I've been meaning to call you."

She shrugged. "I know you must be busy. You always are, especially when you're here." She smiled, "I saw the picture of you and Peeta in the restaurant. I'm glad you have him."

"Me too." She stood awkwardly for a moment and then said, "Do you have time to get a cup of tea?"

"Yes. Let me finish up some things first. It's the end of my shift."

She nodded and watched her mother scurry away. Then she turned to the nurse's station and arranged to have a message sent to Peeta to return to their hotel and she'd meet him there later. She sat in a chair across from the station and waited.

They walked half a block from the hospital to a small café. They got their teas and then sat down at a table outside.

"So how have you been?" her mother asked.

Katniss blurted, "I was pregnant. But I lost it." She sipped her tea, not knowing what else to say.

Her mother was at a loss for words for a moment before she was able to say, "Oh, Katniss, that should never have happened to you."

She nodded. "Mother, I…" She swirled her finger around the rim of her cup. "I don't…" She was at a loss for words. How was she ever to say all the things she needed to say? And was her mother worthy of those words anyway?

"I never did right by you and Prim after your daddy died." Mrs. Everdeen said, breaking the silence. "I let you down. I'm sorry. I've never said it before." She paused, struggling with something. "Katniss, I blamed you for a long time for Prim." He voice caught at the name. "I know it wasn't your fault. I always knew, but I needed someone to blame. Snow was dead." She shook her head. "I'm a horrible mother. You took better care of your sister and me than I could have ever done anyway. You're strong. My blame turned into pride when I remembered that. I'm so sorry for what I became. But, as bad as it is, you're a better woman for it. You're so strong. I'm weak. I always was."

"No, Mother. You're not weak. I'm starting to see… You loved Daddy so much. Losing him crushed you. I resented you because you stopped living for us. When he died, so did part of you. I don't think it was right, but I understand. I've been thinking a lot about it lately and I…I don't know if I would do much better in the same situation."

She reached over and placed her hand on top of her daughter's. "I wish I could go back and change it all."

"I know. I do too." Katniss clenched her jaw. "But we can't."

"I want to get to know you again, Katniss. I want to make it right. Do you think we can?"

"I think so."

"I love you, Katniss."

She just watched her mother for a while. Did she love her mother? She still wasn't sure.

She changed the subject to things that didn't matter as much. She didn't want to think about those things anymore for the moment.


	5. Chapter 5

Peeta paced the hotel. He'd been able to leave the hospital wearing his new leg. They wanted him to wear it for an extended period and then return in two days for a final evaluation and any adjustments that needed to be made. Katniss hadn't known. It was a decision made today. He was more worried, though, about her visit with her mother than her seeing him standing on two legs.

The doorknob rattled and he hurried to greet his wife.

Katniss walked in and sat her key on the table beside the door with a sigh. She smiled slightly at Peeta.

"How did it go?" he asked as he walked over.

"Fine." She said softly. "She wants us to go over to have supper with her before we leave." She finally got a good look at him and her eyes widened. "Oh, my god! How does it feel?" She asked as she walked over to meet him.

"It's good for now. I've been walking all over the place. Probably should take it easy." He wrapped his arms around her and kissed her softly. "So, supper with your mother? When?"

"I said I'd talk with you and then call her."

"Would she let me make some fresh bread in her kitchen?" he asked hopefully.

She smiled. "I think she'd love it. Tomorrow?"

"Yeah, tomorrow."

"So I guess you're going to make me spend a day there?"

"What else do we have to do?" He smoothed some hair away from her face. "And anyway, sweetheart, I like your mother. She adores me. And she loves you dearly, despite your differences."

She nodded and then pressed her eyes into his shoulder. She sighed. "I know she does."

"Hey." He turned his head and kissed her hair. "What's wrong?"

"I want Mother to be different. Like Hazelle. I want her to be strong."

"She _is_ strong. But I doubt there's anyone like Hazelle." He gently scratched her back. "Maybe you come close."

She raised her head and smiled. "Yeah?"

"Yeah." He smiled and kissed her. It was more lingering than their kisses had been lately.

She pulled away. "Peeta." She said in warning. She stepped out of his arms.

"I'm sorry." He reached out a hand and ran it down her arm. "I just don't want you to be like you were after…"

"After which time? The Games we won together? After my sister was killed? After I lost our baby?"

"Every time." He said gently. "Everything bad that happens you take it so much on yourself. It's not your fault. I love you. Your mother loves you. There are so many of us who do. And you don't even seem to think you deserve it, but you do. You give so much of yourself."

"Peeta, why are you saying this?"

"Because I feel like you need to hear it right now." He placed his hands on the side of her face. "Losing the baby wasn't your fault. I know that's what's bothering you."

"That's not what's bothering me. But thank you for bringing it up." She walked around him and plopped down on the couch.

"Then what is it?"

"I don't know." She put her face in her hands. "I don't know." Her shoulders shook as she sobbed.

"Katniss." Peeta said as he sat beside her. "Sweetheart, I'm sorry." He wrapped his arms around her and rested his forehead on her shoulder. "I wanted that baby. I wanted that baby so much. I know you were struggling, but I've always known what I wanted. I want to be like my father. I want to give something to the next generation. There's so much in me that I want to pass on. And there's so much in you." He kissed the back of her neck. "I love you. I want a little girl just like you."

She lifted her head and looked at him. "And a little boy like you." She smiled and blinked the tears from her eyes as she wiped her face. "I'm going to lie down for a while."

"I'll order some room service and bring it to you." He kissed her. "And feed you if you want."

She laughed, "I'm not that pathetic, Peeta." She walked toward the bedroom. "Feel free to come join me."

He smiled. "My arms _have_ been aching for you all day."

She walked back and grabbed his hands. "So come to bed with me." She pulled him along. "I always feel better when you're there with me anyway."

"Aren't you hungry?"

"Not just yet. I feel like kissing my husband for a while." She kissed him. "And having you hold me."

He swung her up into his arms and carried her the rest of the way to the bed.

* * *

"Hello, Mrs. Everdeen." Peeta greeted her. He kissed her cheek and pulled her into a tight embrace.

"Please, Peeta, I'm your mother-in-law. Call me Iris." She demanded as she stepped back.

He smiled. "Iris." He sat a bag of groceries on the counter. "You don't mind me using your kitchen?"

"No, of course not." She awkwardly patted Katniss on the arm. "Hello, Katniss."

Katniss smiled, "Hello, Mother." She kissed her cheek. "Can I help with anything?"

"We're on hold until the bread is ready to bake. I have everything else set to go."

Katniss nodded and sat back to watched as her husband and mother worked together in the kitchen. He had them both covered in flour by the end of it. Katniss laughed at them. It earned her a face-full of flour from her husband.

She sputtered and wiped off the excess. "I'm not cleaning this up." She said.

"No, I will." Peeta said. "I always clean." He wiped more flour off her face and then kissed her. "But you can help me." He said sweetly.

"Don't try to sweet-talk me, Peeta. I know it's Mother you want." She teased.

"I think I _would_ marry your mother. But she'd never have me." He winked. "Would you, Iris?"

"Oh, I don't know, Peeta." She blushed. She looked at her hands. "There's actually something I didn't tell you yesterday, Katniss."

"What is it, Mother?" She asked, fearing the worst.

"I've been seeing someone. And I invited him to supper. I want you to meet him." Her voice shook with worry.

"That's great." Peeta said enthusiastically. "Isn't it, sweetheart?"

Katniss shook herself out of her shock. "Yes, Mother, it is."

She visibly relaxed. "Then you don't mind?"

"Why would I mind?"

"I'm not replacing your father."

"You never could. But he's been gone almost twenty years." Katniss fought with herself, as though she didn't completely agree with her own words. "Is he good to you? I mean, I'm not going to have to threaten him or anything?"

She smiled. "He knows who you are, Katniss. He knows you would kill him if he mistreats me."

"I suppose I need the rest of the facts, then." She walked to the corner and picked up the broom. She started sweeping the mess she swore she wasn't touching. "What's his name? We'll start there."

"Alexander. Alexander Ross. He's a doctor."

"Ross?" Peeta asked. "He's _my_ doctor."

"I know." She said guiltily. "And he knew the entire time. He said it was killing him not to say anything to you." She looked at her daughter. "To both of you."

"It's not like I was very forthcoming with being here." Katniss pointed out. "I'm sorry I avoided you." She put the broom to the side. "So when is he coming?"

"His shift will be over in about an hour. He said he'd be here not long after." She walked over to the refrigerator and started pulling out several different ingredients. She started working and talking. "Since you already know him, what do you think?"

Katniss stepped up beside her and fell into work along with her. "He's confident. He knows what he's doing. He already gets along well with Peeta." She smiled ruefully. "He's perfect for you. I bet you curl up on the couch together and talk about medicine and treatments for all sorts of ailments."

Iris laughed. "Actually we talk a lot about you." She walked over to the cabinet and took out a pan. "I hope you like him in this context. He's always wanted to meet you."

"Always? How long has this been going on?"

She hesitated. "About a year."

Katniss was shocked into silence.

Peeta took over the conversation. "But you like him, right? And he really is good to you?"

"He is. And he's good _for_ me." She smiled. "I love him. He loves me."

"Good. Right, Katniss?"

"Yes. Right." She wiped her hands. "I need some air." She walked out the back door and leaned against the wall.

Iris walked outside and leaned beside her. "Are you angry with me?"

"No, Mother, I'm not angry. I'm overwhelmed." She looked at her. "Do you feel like this is what you want?"

"Yes."

"And you _do_ love him?"

"Very much."

She turned and looked her in the eye. "If he _ever_ lays so much as a finger on you, you tell me. I don't care what excuse you want to give. I'll be here to put an arrow in his leg as a warning."

She smiled at her daughter. "I know you would. But he's a good man. I promise you."

Katniss sighed. She moved a little closer to her mother. Before she realized what she was doing, she wrapped her arms around her.

A while later Alexander Ross arrived at the house. He pulled Iris into his arms and kissed her before he greeted the other two.

"How's that working for you?" He asked Peeta, pointing to his leg.

"Are we going to do the exam right here, Doctor?" Peeta teased.

Alexander laughed, "No, I don't suppose so."

Peeta laughed with him. "Well, I feel great."

They sat down to supper. Katniss was quiet for a while, just watching her mother and Alexander interact. She could tell they really cared for each other. They made every excuse they could to touch each other. And he just glowed in Iris's presence.

Katniss put her fork down. "All right."

All eyes turned to her.

Iris asked, "What?"

She clenched her teeth and then said, "My blessings to you." She pointed her finger at Alexander. "You treat her right." She warned.

"Don't worry." He promised. "I will."

They finished the rest of the meal more relaxed. Katniss joined in and teased her husband a little. He teased her right back.


	6. Chapter 6

Katniss picked up the phone as soon as they walked into their hotel room that evening.

"Calling Gale?" Peeta asked.

"Yeah, this is so weird. I need to tell him." She put the phone to her ear and sat down on the couch.

Finn answered, "Hello?"

"Hey, Finn." She said. "How are you?"

"Good, I guess?"

"You guess?"

"I didn't really want to come back from our vacation."

"I know how that feels."

"Would you like to talk to Dad?"

She was caught off guard by that for a moment and hesitated. "Uh, sure. Let me talk to…Dad." She made a face at Peeta.

"Hi, Catnip." Gale said as he got on the phone.

"Hi, _Dad_." She teased.

"Is there something wrong with that?" He asked defensively.

"Not at all, I was just surprised."

"Well, he's my son just as much as he's Finnick's. And he decided I was his Dad. I was just as shocked at first."

"Yeah, I bet. But you like it?

"I do." She could hear the pride in his voice.

"So, any news about your mother's wedding?"

He groaned. "It will be in the fall. Mother wants all the kids to be part of it. Posy's her maid of honor."

"Are you going to start calling Haymitch Dad?"

"Hell no!" He laughed. "So how are things going there?"

Peeta sat on the end of the couch and pulled Katniss's feet onto his lap.

"Pretty good. Peeta has a new leg he's trying out. And my mother has a boyfriend."

"Did you just say your mother has a boyfriend?"

"Yeah, you heard right." She sighed. "He's Peeta's doctor. And he seems to really care about Mother."

Peeta pulled off Katniss's shoes and started massaging her feet. She smiled at him as she continued to talk to her friend about her mother and the new boyfriend. Gale was sympathetic, having been through a mother dating later in life.

"But, you know, she has just as much right to happiness as you." He offered.

"And I never said she didn't. I _know_ she does. More than anyone. Well, not your mother. She's waited just as long."

"She has. And you say she looks like she's happy. So don't worry about it."

"I'm not. Not really." She sighed and moved to lean against Peeta. "How are Annie and the kids?"

"Great. Everyone's great. Mags is growing so much. You need to come see her. Come see us. You can stop by on your way back to Twelve." He suggested.

"Maybe. I'll talk to my lovely husband here and see what he has to say about that. But I think he will jump at the chance to play with your daughter."

"Good. Then we'll plan to see you in a few days."

"Katniss and Peeta are coming?" Finn asked from the background.

Katniss laughed. "Well, I guess we have to go now. I'll let you know."

She hung up the phone after a few more words. She reached over and put the phone up. "What do you say?" She asked.

"Definitely." He said as he pinned her to the couch.

"Finn is calling Gale Dad now." She said, reaching up to comb her finger through his hair.

"Is that so?" He kissed her.

"Mm." She stared into his eyes. "Why are you so handsome?"

He smiled. "I don't know. Why are you so beautiful?"

She smiled back. "I don't know."

He kissed her again. "So when can we try again?"

"Peeta…"

"We are going to try, right? You won't give up on me?"

"I don't know." She moved from under him. "Why is that all you worry about? We don't need children. We love each other, right?"

"Of course, sweetheart." He stood and reached out for her, but she stepped out of his reach.

"So why do we need children? Am I not enough for you?"

"That's not the point. Are you scared you'll lose every baby we conceive?"

"Yeah, actually, I am. And why not? What have I done in my life to deserve anything else? What have _you_ done?"

"You saved a lot of people."

"I killed a lot of people. And what if it all starts up again?"

"What if what starts up again?"

"The Games. The oppression. Fearing for our lives, wondering where our next meal is coming from."

"You never have to worry about that. We have plenty and we always will. You know how to hunt for crying out loud. That works for all those things. And they would _never_ start the Games again. You saw to that."

She shook her head. "It doesn't matter. I'm scared. I'm always scared." She looked around helplessly. "Everything keeps going. Everyone is moving on with their lives. But I'm stuck in all those old fears." She shook her head. "I know you want it, but the more I think about it, the more I think we should just abandon the idea." She turned and walked into the bedroom.

Peeta walked into the room as she changed for bed. He watched her unspeaking.

"What are you going to say?" she demanded.

"That I don't understand you. You were alright with this. We were going to do this. Even after you lost the baby, you said we'd try again. But now you don't want to. What the hell am I supposed to _think_ , Katniss? What am I supposed to do?"

"Divorce me? Find some woman that can give you children? That's willing to do it?"

"And what would I do with some other woman's children? I married you because I love you, Katniss. It's not about children. Yeah, I want them desperately, but if I don't have you, I have nothing." He made a fist and pounded it gently on the door frame. "To hell with all of it. You don't want them? Fine, I'll stop talking about it. And if _you_ mention it, I'm going to walk out of the room. In fact," he walked over to the bed and picked up a pillow. "I'm sleeping on the couch. Goodnight."

"Don't do this, Peeta." She begged.

He said nothing.

She stood in the doorway and watched as he settled on the couch, facing away from her. She turned angrily and slammed the door. She threw herself across the bed, fighting the frustrated tears.

Sometime in the night, as Katniss tossed and turned, Peeta walked into the room. He got into the bed.

"I can't sleep on that damn couch." He draped an arm over her.

She hooked a leg over his and finally relaxed into sleep.

* * *

Peeta sat up and watched Katniss sleep for a while longer before he got up and started dressing. He called room service to send up breakfast for them. He scratched his mussed hair and turned back to the bedroom.

Katniss stood there. "When do you go back to the doctor?"

"Tomorrow morning." He leaned against the back of the couch. "What do you want to do today?"

She shrugged. "You have any ideas?"

"I'd like to visit the memorial. We haven't done that yet. Check on the progress. Pay our respects. And I'm sure all the paparazzi are watching for us to do it."

She sighed. "Peeta…"

"Or we could just stay in."

"It's not… Okay. We'll go."

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"I thought you said you didn't want to talk about it anymore?" she accused.

"Well, I don't want to upset you. And I don't like you angry with me."

"Peeta…" She walked over to him and placed her hands on his shoulders. "I'm not angry." She slid her hands down his arms and gripped his hands. "I don't think there's anything else I can say to let you see my position on this. I've given you every reason I have a thousand times."

"And I've given you mine just as many times." He kissed her. "I'm fine with whatever you want."

"Don't just fold like that." She stepped away.

"What do you want from me?" he was defeated.

"I—"

She was cut off by a knock at the door. Peeta opened it and ushered in the food he'd ordered. Katniss stood silently as he spoke with the young woman who had brought the tray. He smiled and sent her on her way.

He turned back to his wife. "Are we finishing this?"

She chewed on her lip. "What I want from you is for you to not just say, 'whatever you want, sweetheart.' Like you do every time I say something against you."

He nodded. "Okay. We'll take it one step at a time. We can't even do it right now, it's still too early. When the possibility comes around again, if you want to bring it up for discussion, _you_ do that. I'll try to keep my mouth shut about it for a while because I really have been hounding you about it. And I'm sorry."

"I like the way that sounds." She said softly. "Okay. I can do that."

"Good." Peeta walked over to his wife and placed a hand on her cheek. "I love you, Katniss."

"I love you, too, Peeta."

They shared a kiss and then Katniss stepped away. "What did you order? I'm starving."

* * *

Peeta and Katniss stood silently at the memorial wall with their hands clasped between them. Katniss reached out and ran her hands over a name. "Primrose Everdeen" it read. Peeta squeezed her hand.

They moved down the wall and barely registered most of the names. They'd read them several times as the wall was put together. They stopped again, this time beside "Finnick Odair."

Peeta said, "Do you think Annie will bring Finn now that it's complete?"

"They still have a few finishing touches. And the ceremony is still months away." She turned to him. "And she has Gale and Maggie to think about now. Gale helps her deal with the madness and depression."

He nodded. He kissed her nose. "You help me with that. Did you know? You're the only reason I've been able to go on sometimes."

"You're the only reason I've been able to go on. I lost so much."

He nodded, "I know."

"Can we go back to the hotel now? I can't be here anymore."

"Yeah, of course."

A few people stopped them to tell them how happy they were for the pair to be visiting. Peeta briefly spoke to them while Katniss stood stonily at his side. They moved on, only to be stopped by a woman with a recorder who said she was a reporter.

Peeta once again spoke for the both of them even when Katniss was asked a direct question. He knew this would probably trigger a nightmare tonight. He could already feel the stress of it affecting his own mind.

"We're hopeful that the final stages of the memorial will go off without a hitch and that the ceremony will be as beautiful and touching as the ten year anniversary almost two years ago." He smiled and nodded and then led Katniss away.

He waved at others, but didn't let them detain him. He hailed a taxi so that they didn't have to see anyone else.

At the hotel, Katniss went to the bedroom and stretched out on the bed. "Come join me?" She asked.

Without a word, he walked in and climbed in beside her. He pulled her into his arms.

"Being around things like that always takes away my energy. I'm sorry I made you do all the talking."

"It's fine. I'm better with words anyway." He teased.

"Always able to think on your toes." She agreed. She moved closer to him. "I need a nap."

"Me too. We don't have anything else to do."

She kissed him. She rubbed her hand up and down his back slowly. Her eyes drooped and she fell asleep.


	7. Chapter 7

No adjustments had to be made at Peeta's final appointment. Everything checked out with the new leg. Katniss and Peeta had one more dinner with Iris and Alexander. This time, they went out to a small out-of-the-way place the older couple frequented.

"I think someone's followed us." Katniss pointed out, nodding toward a gawker with a camera not hidden very well under a napkin.

"Don't worry about it, sweetheart." Peeta said, putting an arm around the back of her chair. He kissed her cheek. "Just smile and think about being in District Two tomorrow evening away from them. Playing with Mags."

" _That_ is what you are looking forward to. _I'm_ looking forward to going to the range with Gale and Finn." One side of her mouth tilted up. She looked at her mother. "So what plans do you two have?"

"Work." Iris said. "And spending time together." She smiled at her beau.

Alexander smiled back, but said nothing.

They ate, ignoring as the paparazzo became more forward with his pictures.

Katniss was uncomfortable with it. She gripped Peeta's leg tightly.

"Loosen up, Katniss." He whispered. "It's okay."

She clenched her jaw and shook her head. "Why do they need pictures of us?"

"It's you they want to take pictures of." Alexander said. "Everyone here is fascinated with you. I've had so many questions from other staff about you after you and Peeta have left."

"Is that why you're with my mother? Why have pictures when you can see the real thing?"

"Not at all. I fell for Iris before I knew she was your mother. She doesn't like to broadcast it unless she knows people won't exploit her for it." He squeezed the woman's hand and smiled at her. "You should hear the pride in her voice when she talks about you."

"But now everyone will know when they see the news." She looked at her mother. "Are you ready for that backlash?"

Iris looked between all the other people, stopping when she locked eyes with Alexander. "We can do it."

"Are you about to tell me you're getting married?" Katniss joked.

"No." her mother assured her. "We're not there yet. But we will let you know if that changes."

"Is it likely to change?" Peeta asked.

Iris smiled, "Not any time soon."

"Good." Katniss said. "Because with Hazelle and Haymitch tying the knot, I don't know how I'd handle your wedding plans on top of that. They asked us to be in the ceremony."

"Oh, really?"

"Yeah, Peeta's best man. I'm in the bridal party with Annie and Posy." Katniss gave a wry smile. "I wish Cinna were around to design the clothes. He knew what looked good on me. He knew what looked good on everyone."

Peeta kissed her temple.

* * *

Thankfully with the last-minute change in their trip plans, they weren't able to be put in a fancy car. They got a small private compartment, though. And everyone commented on the pictures all over all the news. They asked Katniss if the woman pictured was really her mother. She reluctantly told them she was. She hoped her mother and Andrew would be all right.

She held Peeta's hand the entire trip. It was early evening when they pulled into the train station in District Two. Finn bounced up and down and waved when he saw them.

"Katniss! Peeta!" he called. He pushed his way through the crowd. "Hi!"

Peeta laughed and ruffled his hair. "Hey, kid. How's it going?"

"Why does everyone always mess with my hair?" He smoothed his locks down.

"Chill out, buddy." Gale poked Finn's ribs and then pulled Katniss into a hug. "Catnip."

"Gale." She sighed. She was brought back momentarily to the forest and hunting and berries and poking fun at Effie Trinket and the other denizens of the Capitol. She stepped back. "Where are your ladies?"

"Mags is teething and has been very cranky today so Annie decided to keep her home." He picked up her bag that she'd put down.

"It's driving me up the wall." Finn said. "She was horrible on the trip home from Four."

"She wasn't that bad." Gale protested.

They piled into the car. Katniss sat up front with Gale.

Finn leaned forward and asked, "Dad, are we still going to the range tomorrow after you get off work?"

"Finnick, you sit back and buckle your seatbelt or we won't go at all while Katniss and Peeta are here." He warned.

"Yes, sir." He sat back. "But are we?"

"That depends on if Katniss wants to go." He pulled out onto the road. "Do you?" he asked his friend expectantly.

"I'd love to. It's been quite a few days since I've shot a bow."

"Good." Finn said from the back seat.

Katniss laughed. "Are you any better, Finn?" She asked, turning in her seat to look at him.

"So much better. Right, Dad?"

Gale smiled proudly. "Right. Better every day." He chuckled. "I'm trying to convince Annie to let us put up a range at the house. Maybe in the back yard, put up a few walls or something so the arrows don't go where they shouldn't."

"That would be nice. Peeta, we should do that."

"Sweetheart, you go hunting. You don't need targets. You get real-life practice."

She laughed. "I'm going to teach our children to hunt and I'd rather do it in a controlled situation."

"Children?" Peeta asked from the back seat.

"Forget I said that." She said hastily.

He was quiet in the back seat, but she knew he had a smug smile on his face.

Finn jumped out of the car as soon as Gale stopped. He gathered all the bags and went inside ahead of everyone. The adults exited the car at a much slower pace, Peeta reaching out and catching his wife's hand as they walked.

Annie was walking the floor with Mags when they stepped into the house. She was almost asleep on her mother's shoulder, her eyes almost completely shut. When she saw her father come in, she held out her hand to him.

"Dada." She said softly.

"Maggie." He kissed her chubby cheek and smoothed down her hair. "It's okay." He kissed his wife and then stepped back. "Look who we found."

"Hi." Annie said. "Have a good trip?"

"It wasn't bad." Peeta said.

"Long. Like always." Katniss added.

"She just likes to be outside." Her husband pointed out.

"Did you have supper?" Annie asked.

"Yeah, we ate on the train."

"Well, help yourself to anything in the kitchen. Make yourselves at home. I'm going to try to put her down." She walked up the stairs as Finn walked down.

"I put your bags in the guest room." The boy announced to them.

"Thank you." Katniss yawned. "I'm exhausted."

"That's a long trip from the Capitol." Gale said. "Take a seat if you want."

Katniss sat down on the chair and curled her legs underneath her.

Peeta sat on the sofa nearby. "So, we're all in the wedding, huh?"

Gale sighed, "Yeah. You're the best man. How do feel about that?"

"It's a big responsibility. But I can handle it."

"Yep. You know, I don't know why they're going all out for this."

"Maybe it's Haymitch's idea." Katniss said with a laugh. "Seems more his style than your mother's."

Gale laughed along with her, "Yeah."

Finn shuffled cards nearby and watched as the adults made small talk for a while.

Katniss caught his eye. "Want to play a game?" She asked.

He smiled, "You know how to play Poker?"

"Finn," Annie warned as she came down the stairs, "You're not playing Poker with Katniss. I already don't like that you play it with Gale."

"Aw, Mom, you're no fun."

"I don't care if you think I'm fun or not." She sat down beside Gale. "I'm your mom and I say no gambling."

"It's just a game. I don't play with real money."

"It could become real. Play Go Fish or something."

"Go Fish is for babies. I'm almost twelve."

Annie sighed. "I know you are."

The room was silent for a moment as they all thought back to what that age would have meant in the past. All except the boy, who knew about the Reaping but would never fully understand it. They talked about it at school, but they didn't show the full brutality of it until much later in the learning process. Katniss and Peeta had been in a committee that saw to that mandate.

Peeta cleared his throat. "Well, if we can't play Poker or Go Fish, what about Rummy?"

"How do you play that?"

For the rest of the evening, the group played Rummy. Katniss won by a very narrow margin. Peeta was good at strategy, but so was Katniss. "Maybe tomorrow you guys can play me again and win back your dignity."

"We'll pay you back on the range." Finn threatened good-naturedly.

Katniss laughed, "Oh, yeah. We'll see about that. Maybe we can add your score to Gale's and see if it matches mine."

"Hey!" Gale said. "I'm almost as good as you."

"Almost." She laughed again as she stood. "Thank you, Hawthornes, for letting us stay with you. I'm going to bed. I'll see you all in the morning." She walked upstairs.

The rest of the house followed not long after.

Peeta climbed into bed beside her. He said softly, "You mentioned our children in the car."

"I told you to forget about it."

"I'm not going to forget about it."

She propped herself up on her elbow. "Look, I know that it's what you want. I've known for a long time that it's what you want. But I'm still struggling with it. You should know that. You must experience it too. You _have_ to. You were there with me almost every step of the way."

"There's no more Reaping." He reached up his hand and pushed her hair behind her ear. "You don't need to worry about it."

"I know I don't. But I saw the look on Annie's face when Finn said he was almost twelve. She knows. She understands. I don't know why you don't."

"But I do."

"Then respect my choice to take my time with this."

"I do."

"And anyway, you promised you wouldn't say anything it about it." She rested her head on his shoulder. "So shut up and let me sleep."

He wrapped his arms around her and kissed her head. "Whatever you say, sweetheart."

She laughed around her yawn. "Goodnight."


	8. Chapter 8

Finn shot another arrow down the range. It landed closer to the center, but was still a little off. Katniss stepped forward and gave him a few pointers. Gale stayed back and watched. Finn shot another arrow. It landed in the center of the target.

"I got it!" Finn exalted.

"Good. Now try it again." Katniss prompted.

He did and got another bull's-eye.

"And now a third time to make sure it wasn't an accident."

The third time went a little wide. "Aw, man." He said, dejected.

"It's okay. Keep practicing." She patted his back. "You're already so much better."

Gale smiled at her as she walked back to him. "You're a good teacher." He commented.

She grinned. "Thanks. Just building on what you already taught him."

They watched the boy shoot a few more times. He flexed his fingers.

"Time to go back." Gale said.

"Dad, do we have to go?" The boy whined.

"No need to go any farther. You'll just hurt yourself."

Katniss took the bow from him and put it away. "I'm really proud of you, Finn. You're doing a good job."

Finn beamed. "Thanks, Katniss."

"No problem, kid."

They gathered their arrows and headed out of the building toward where Gale parked the car.

"Do you ever get a chance to hunt?" Katniss asked as they climbed into the car.

"Not really. Now that we live a little farther out, I guess I could. But I'd lose time seeing Maggie do all her first things."

Katniss smiled. "You really like this, don't you? Being a dad?"

He grinned. "I love it. I was made for it. That one back there keeps me on my toes." He winked in the rearview mirror. "And Maggie is growing and learning new things. New words. It's amazing."

Katniss sat back and stared out the window.

He mumbled, "You don't have to."

"Hm?"

"It's not for everyone." He said softly. "Don't let him pressure you into something you don't want."

She looked at him nervously. She murmured, "I don't know what I want half the time." She turned her gaze back to the window and was silent the rest of the ride.

* * *

"Dada!" Mags exclaimed when her father walked through the front door. She crawled quickly toward him.

He chuckled and leaned down to scoop her up. He kissed her and held her in the air. "How is my Maggie today? Have you had fun with Peeta?"

"Peeta!" She giggled.

"I guess that's a yes." He kissed her again and then put her on the floor. He held onto her hands and walked slowly behind her as she wobbled on her tiny legs. "Soon enough, sweet pea, you can do this on your own like everyone else." He swung her up into his arms again and walked the last few feet to Annie. He kissed her. "Hi."

"Hi." She said back.

Katniss watched all of this with a discerning eye. She walked over and sat in a chair opposite her husband.

"How was Finn at the range?" Peeta asked.

"I got two bull's-eyes, Peeta." Finn said happily.

"Did you really? That's great!"

"Did you hear, Mom?" the boy turned to his parents.

"I did, baby. That's fantastic." Annie said, sitting down beside him.

"I missed every other time, though."

"Finn, you're doing very well." Katniss said. "Don't be down. You got it close every other time."

"My school friends don't really believe you're helping teach me to shoot a bow."

"Yeah, District Two's not really big on gossip. No cameras following me around everywhere to document my every move."

"Is that a good thing?" Finn asked.

"A very good thing." Peeta said. "My wife hates everyone knowing our business."

"Because it's _our_ business." Maggie crawled over and pulled herself up on Katniss's leg. She looked at the baby.

Mags made a happy sound and patted Katniss's leg. "Peeta!" She said.

"You have that one down pretty well, don't you?"

"She loves learning new words." Gale said. "She'll say it over and over until she learns a new one."

She nodded and leaned closer to the baby. "Can you say 'Katniss'?"

Maggie gave her a questioning look.

"Katniss. That's me. Can you say it? Kat-niss."

"Peeta!" she said happily.

She smiled. "You'll learn." She picked up the baby. She noticed Peeta staring. "Stop it." She snapped.

"Maggie, you need to learn to say Katniss." He said, ignoring his wife. "It's a nice name."

Katniss hid her smile in Maggie's hair. "You're ridiculous."

"You're the one blushing." He teased. "After being with me all this time, it makes me feel good I can still make you smile like that."

She met his eyes. "Makes me feel good too." She smoothed her hand over Maggie's hair. "I need to add her to the book."

"Oh, right." Annie said. "I have a few pictures I can get you. I have a great one of Finn holding her. I'll go get it." She got up and hurried from the room.

"What book are you talking about?" Finn asked.

"A project Peeta and Haymitch and I put together. For all of Panem, but mostly for the surviving victors."

"Here you go." Annie came in, waving a picture around. She passed it to Katniss. "Isn't that great?"

She looked at the picture. It was a candid shot of Finn playing with his baby sister. Both laughed happily. "Perfect." She showed Peeta.

He smiled. "Yeah, perfect." He took it from her and examined it. "You look so much like your dad, Finn."

"More and more every day." Annie said fondly. She exchanged a look with Gale.

Katniss caught the look that passed between them. Gale looked hurt, but only for a moment. Annie was apologetic. She patted his knee. Katniss made a note to ask her friend about that later.

"Mom, I'm hungry." Finn said.

Annie smiled at her son. "Then go start supper."

"But I don't want to." He whined.

"Finn," Gale warned, "You know how to cook and it _is_ your night."

"But, Dad, I want to visit with Katniss and Peeta."

"They'll be here a whole week. And we knew them first so we get to visit more." He nodded his head toward the kitchen. "Go."

Finn sighed and hoisted himself out of the chair.

Mags relaxed against Katniss's chest with a sigh of her own. The woman was unsure at first what to do. She wrapped an arm around the girl's torso and started combing her fingers through the girl's dark locks.

"Kat." She said.

"No one ever called me Kat before. I think I like it." She smiled at Peeta. "What do you think?"

"A lot of things I really shouldn't say in front of our hosts." He murmured.

She laughed softly and continued to absently stroke Maggie's hair.

There was a crash in the kitchen.

"You okay in there?" Annie called.

"Yeah, just dropped a pan." He called back.

"Or twenty." She stood, "I better go check on him."

Gale caught her hand. "Hey."

She turned. "What?"

"It's okay." He said softly.

She nodded and left the room.

After exchanging a look with his wife, Peeta stood and followed. "Do you have any flour?" he asked as he caught up with her.

"This is the part where you analyze a small moment that passed between me and my wife." Gale said. He moved closer to her and reached out his hands to Maggie.

She lunged toward him. "Dada."

Katniss passed her over. "Why don't you just tell me then?"

He smiled at his daughter and bounced her up and down. "It's nothing, Catnip. I'm sure you and Peeta have gone through the same thing."

"Peeta has always been in love with me. And as much as I love you, I never loved you _that_ way. So talk to me."

He looked into the kitchen and saw his wife helping Peeta gather some cooking essentials. "I'm always competing with Finnick." He said softly as he returned his gaze to his daughter. "I know she loves me, but he was in her heart first. That's a big hole to fill."

"It is. I can only imagine…But you're not competing with him. She married you, Gale. You have a family together."

He shook his head. "Yeah, but sometimes I feel like Finn accepts me more than Annie."

"Finn never knew his dad."

"I get it." He kissed his daughter and smiled at her. "And it's getting easier. There are fewer days that she stays in bed. There's more laughter. More smiles." He met Katniss's eyes. "She's the best thing that ever happened to me."

"Good to know."

"And how are things with Peeta these days?"

"We're good." She said shortly.

"Come on, I just bared my heart to you."

She let out a long breath. "He really wants a baby. And when I was pregnant, I kind of did too. But not enough to want to try again after losing it."

"You're good with mine. You can just be Aunt Katniss to them. If you don't want your own, don't have them. Don't do that to your kids."

"But what if—?" She cut herself off. "I have this feeling I'd love my children. I just don't want to bring life into our world. I still have nightmares. Peeta still has his issues." She shook her head. "I just can't make him understand that."

"He understands perfectly. And he loves you more than anyone could ever love anyone." He smiled reassuringly. "And you never know how cute your kids can be."

"Probably cuter than yours." She smirked. "Are you going to have any more?"

"I think we're going to try." He shrugged. "Who knows?"


	9. Chapter 9

"I have an idea." Peeta said as he sat down on the bed that night.

"An idea I'll like?" Katniss asked, sitting opposite him.

"I don't know." He paused and looked at her. "I want to babysit Maggie and Finn. Let Gale and Annie take some time to be really alone."

She smiled, "Finn wouldn't be too happy to hear you say you want to babysit him. He's almost a teenager."

His face was grim. "Almost old enough to kill someone, right?"

She flinched. "Not what I meant."

"I know." His smile returned. "I think you should try it out."

"You think it will push me to choose?"

"You're so good with them, sweetheart. Finn thinks the sun rises and sets with you. And Maggie gave you a nickname."

She chuckled. "It's only because she can't say Katniss yet." She scooted closer to her husband. She crooked her finger. "Come here."

His smile changed. "Why? I thought we weren't doing that for a while."

"I can kiss you." She did, quickly. "And I can touch you." She trailed her fingers down his neck and chest. Her hand came to rest on his hip. She caught her lip between her teeth. "Do you want me to?"

"Here? In our friends' house? With their eleven-year-old on the other side of that wall?" He pulled her on top of him.

She smiled down at him. "I just want to kiss you for a while. No harm in that."

He pushed her hair out of her face. "No harm in kissing. But you should probably keep your hands a little more northward."

She tangled her fingers in his hair. "This good?"

He nodded before their lips met again. He combed his fingers through her hair and rested his hands on the small of her back. He pulled her closer. A moan escaped his throat as she straddled him.

She lifted her head away.

"Don't stop." He begged.

She smiled and pressed her mouth to his again. Their tongues met. It was gentle at first, almost tentative.

Peeta's hand came up to cup the back of her head.

This act gave Katniss leave to deepen the kiss. She untangled one hand from his hair and trailed it down his chest. She slipped her hand under the hem of his shirt and splayed her fingers out on his bare flesh.

He moaned again and guided her hand downward.

"You need to be a little quieter." She whispered as she started to rub her palm over his growing erection.

"Shut up." He said with a grin. "Keep going." He slipped a hand under her shirt as he thrust against her.

She covered his mouth with hers again. He moved faster against the pressure of her hand. His breathing was ragged and she could feel all the nuances to which she had grown accustom after all these years together.

She broke the kiss, leaving her lips close to his. They brushed whens she asked, "You good?"

"Mm." His voice came out as a whine. "Almost."

His body tensed. He groaned deep in his throat followed by the dampening of the front of his pants. She kissed him softly.

"Well." He panted, collapsing backward into the mattress.

She sat back on his legs. His hand was still up her shirt. She gently removed it and moved to sit beside him. His eyes followed her.

"What?" She asked.

"I can never get over how beautiful you are."

She scoffed. "Why are you so cheesy?"

"Because you like it." He caught her hand and brought it to his lips. "You like me being cheesy."

"Maybe a little." She examined his face. "Were you serious about us spending time alone with Finn and Maggie?"

"Of course I was." He rolled out of the bed and dug through his bag for new clothes. "Don't you think it will be fun?"

"My idea of fun isn't wiping up drool and changing diapers."

"So you hang out with Finn and I'll take care of Maggie." He smiled. " _I_ think it would be fun. And Annie and Gale really don't have any time alone." He crawled over to her and pinned her to the bed. "What do you say?" He kissed her. "Give our two best friends a break?" He kissed her again.

"You kissing me isn't going to make me think any better. In fact, it makes my mind all mushy."

He smiled and rolled away from her. He was on his side facing the wall.

She wrapped her arm around him and kissed his cheek. "It'll be a challenge. And I like challenges. Let's do it. But let's try to get Finn out of the room when we talk about it. I want to have an adult conversation and not have to deal with the kid." She said affectionately. She kissed him again and then settled her head on the pillow behind him.

"Deal." He kissed her palm. "I love you."

"I love you, too."

* * *

"So what do you think?" Peeta asked Gale and Annie as he finished his proposal the following afternoon.

They exchanged a look. Annie was grinning. Gale smiled affectionately. He kissed her knuckles.

"I think it's a fantastic idea." He said.

"But are you sure?" Annie asked, looking at Katniss. "I mean, you two aren't used to dealing with babies."

"How hard could it be?" Katniss said with a shrug.

Annie smiled. "You say that now…"

"I have to go make a call." Gale got up from the couch and carried the phone into the kitchen.

"Really, you two, I—"

"Mom, you have _got_ to make Maggie stop crying." Finn said, carrying his screaming baby sister. "I've tried everything."

"It's another tooth." She held out her arms. "Give her here and go get a rag with an ice cube for me, please." As he walked away, Annie explained to her friends, "If you let her chew on a piece of ice, it numbs her gums a little. And after the ice is all melted away, she'll usually chew on the rag for a while. Either that or rubbing her gums with your finger."

Katniss nodded nervously as Peeta moved to sit beside Annie.

"Where's the tooth?" he asked.

She took his hand and showed him where the tooth was coming in.

"Wow."

Maggie quieted as he moved his finger over her aching gums. She bit down a little.

"Feel better, pumpkin?" he asked softly.

Gale came back into the room. "Honey, I've got a surprise." He walked over and whispered in her ear.

Her eyes widened as he pulled away. "Are you serious?"

"Best restaurant in town. Say 'thank you, Katniss and Peeta.'"

"Yes, thank you." She took the rag Finn offered. She gave it to Maggie who chewed it happily. "This means so much." She kissed her daughter's temple. "I'll miss you, baby girl." She smoothed a hand over Finn's hair. "You too, Finn."

"Why? Where are you going?"

"Gale and I are going to spend an evening out and you and Maggie will be spending the evening with Katniss and Peeta."

He lit up. "Really?"

Katniss smiled at him and relaxed. "Really. We can play cards and stuff."

"I wish we could go to the range."

"It's just going to be a few hours. It wouldn't be worth it to try. We'll make supper and play with Mags and play a few hands of cards. We won't have time for anything else." She smiled and winked. "Just have your allowance ready."

"Be kind." Annie begged. "Don't get too crazy." She smiled at her husband. "What time?"

"Not until 7. But I'd love to just walk around or something. Maybe sit in the park for a while."

"Mama?" Maggie said.

"Maggie." She kissed her daughter. "Mama loves you. I love you very much. But I need to go get ready." She kissed her again and then passed her off to Gale. She skipped out of the room.

Maggie started crying again. "Mama."

"Sh." Gale said. "It's okay, sweetpea. Daddy has you."

She rested her head on his shoulder and sniffed. "Dada."

"Yeah, Maggie." He kissed her. "So, you sure you're up for this? She's never been away from Annie."

"We'll figure it out." Peeta said, patting the girl's back. "And it's only a few hours, like Katniss said."

* * *

"Oh, my god, when are they getting home?" Katniss said as Maggie continued to cry.

Maggie had cried off and on for the entire evening. She stopped long enough to eat and chew on a rag to relieve her aching gums. As the night wore on, the crying became more incessant.

Katniss and Finn played poker in the kitchen as Peeta walked around with Maggie in the living room. Katniss threw her cards down and walked into the living room.

She held out her arms. "Here, let me try. I've heard enough of this. Maybe you're holding her wrong."

"I'm not holding her wrong." He argued.

"Have you changed her?"

"Yes. And I've checked her again, she's fine."

"Maybe it's the tooth."

"It's not the damn tooth, Katniss. She threw the rag across the room."

Finn appeared at his shoulder. "Try the bounce."

They both looked at him questioningly.

"Bounce her a little. She likes that when she's going to sleep. She doesn't like to, but she's tired. Look at her eyes. They're heavy."

"How do I do the bounce?" Peeta asked.

Finn took the baby over and demonstrated the proper bounce technique. Maggie quieted. Peeta took her back and tried the bounce, but she only continued to bawl.

"Let me try." Katniss said again, gently taking the baby from her husband.

Almost as soon as she was in Katniss arms, she went silent. She stuck her thumb in her mouth and whimpered a little. "Mama." She said around her thumb.

"I know you want your mama, Maggie. She'll be home soon. But it wouldn't be so bad if you went to sleep. Mama understands." She bounced Maggie and walked around the room with her.

Finn yawned and stretched out on the couch. "Wake me when Mom and Dad get home."

Peeta chuckled, "Sure thing." He sat on a chair and watched as his wife continued to walk around the room. She murmured softly to the baby, but Peeta couldn't hear what she said. He always told her he thought she was beautiful. But he never realized how beautiful until she had a baby in her arms. So what if it wasn't his. In this moment, she was gorgeous.

"Stop staring at me like that." She said softly.

"Like what?"

She looked over at Finn. His arm was thrown over his eyes. She made her way across the room. She sat on his lap. "I don't know if I can do this all the time. She nearly drove me mad with all the crying."

"I know she did, but she stopped as soon as she was in your arms. You're a natural at this." He smoothed a hand over Maggie's hair. "And they say it's different with your own."

She looked between her husband and the baby she still held. "She's so soft. And she fits so well against my chest." Her eyes were brimming when she looked at him again. "I want one. Let's have one. Let's try again."

He smiled and wiped at her eyes. "Okay. You just let me know when."

She leaned in and kissed him. "When we get home. As soon as we get home."

He kissed her again. They continued to kiss for a long time. They were still kissing when Gale and Annie came into the house.

Gale cleared his throat and the pair jumped apart. He threw a blanket over Finn on the couch. The boy turned over and pulled the blanket over his shoulders. He smoothed his hand lightly over the boy's hair.

Katniss stood and met Annie with Mags. "She just fell asleep."

"Did she do all right?" Annie asked.

"She did fine." Peeta said, wrapping his arms around Katniss from behind. "She was fussy, but not bad. Katniss actually got her to calm down and sleep."

"She was already almost there, I just helped her the rest of the way."

"She has the bounce down perfectly." He kissed her cheek. "So how was your date?"

"It was great being able to talk without worrying over why the Maggie's crying or what Finn is trying to convince us to let him do now." Annie kissed Maggie's forehead. "I missed them so much though."

"It was a nice break." Gale said. "Thank you."

"It was fun." Peeta said around a yawn.

Annie laughed. "But exhausting."

"Yeah." He stepped away from Katniss and stretched. "I'll get those last few dishes cleaned." He started for the kitchen, but Annie stopped him.

"They can wait. Let's all retire for the night." She headed for the stairs, pulling Gale behind her.

Gale smiled, "Just get the lights, yeah?"

Katniss giggled, "Wonder what's going to happen in _their_ room tonight?"

Peeta turned out the lights. "I don't want to know. I just need to sleep."

"You sure you want a baby?" she asked as they walked upstairs together.


	10. Chapter 10

Katniss closed the front door and leaned against it with a sigh.

"Glad to be home?" Peeta asked, setting down their bags.

She smiled. "I love those kids. I love Gale and Annie. But I'm all District 12. I don't know how they do it. Two's not for me."

"I know what you mean." He stepped close to her. "So you going hunting in the morning?"

"I don't know." She yawned and turned her head away. "I'm tired."

"Tired? You said we'd start trying again."

"When I said 'as soon as we get home,' I really didn't mean the moment we got home." She stepped around him, grabbing his hand as she went. "I won't say no to kissing you and cuddling with you."

"I don't want to cuddle. Abstinence isn't really a good thing for me." He grabbed her around the waist and buried his face in her neck. "You smell so good." He growled.

"I've been on the train for two days."

"Still smell good to me." He nibbled on her ear lobe.

"Stop, Peeta." She giggled.

He let go of her, but slipped his hand into hers. "I love you."

She smiled over her shoulder. "I love you."

He kissed her hand.

In their bedroom, Katniss collapsed across the bed fully clothed.

Peeta chuckled and stretched out beside her. "Long trip."

"Yep." She yawned again and kicked off her shoes. She crawled up to her pillow and pressed her face into it. "Mm."

"What?" he asked, moving up beside her.

"It smells like home." She turned her head and smiled. Her eyes drooped. "Sleepy."

"Yeah." He got up and undressed as she watched drowsily. "Like what you see?"

"Always."

"I'm getting a little bigger around the middle." He patted his stomach.

"Like I care. I didn't fall in love with your body." She rolled over and stretched. "I should change out of these clothes, but I can't make myself get up."

He climbed over and tugged at the hem of her shirt. "Let me help you, sweetheart."

"No sex tonight unless you're into doing all the work."

"I like trying new things." He teased. He pushed up her shirt some more and kissed her stomach.

She sighed and threaded her fingers through his hair. "Okay, but be quick."

"I don't want to be quick." He pushed up her shirt some more and kissed a trail up with it. He hummed against her skin.

She sat up slightly and removed her shirt. She reached down and pushed at his underwear, resting her hands on his hips.

Peeta rolled to his side and pushed at the rest of her clothes.

Then she was naked underneath him. He touched her, feather light with his fingertips, every inch of her.

"Perfect. As always."

She smiled. "I'm suddenly very awake." She ran her hand up his arm. "So what are you going to do?"

He leaned over and kissed her softly as he brought her underneath him. "I'm _not_ going to be quick about this."

"Okay."

He kissed her again. She kissed back, but there was something off about it. He lifted his head. "Is something wrong?"

She opened her mouth and then closed it. She shook her head. "It's nothing. I'm fine."

"Tell me, Katniss." He demanded.

"It feels good, the way you're touching me and kissing me. But I don't know if I'm into doing this right now."

"You want me to stop?"

"No, don't stop. Maybe it's just slow to get started this time."

"Well, don't say I didn't try, sweetheart." He kissed her again, sliding his hands down her sides and pulled her hips up.

She wrapped her legs around his waist. Her hands roamed over his back.

Peeta groaned and raised his head once more. "I love you."

She smiled, "I love _you_."

He lowered his head and kissed her under her ear. He kissed down her neck and nibbled lightly on her flesh.

She sighed and tangled her fingers in his hair.

His tongue trailed down her chest. He covered her breasts with kisses, humming against her skin some more.

Katniss tried everything to get into it, but she was not feeling it. She combed her fingers through Peeta's hair and relaxed into his touch and the feel of his lips against her flesh. She wasn't bored. She just wasn't at all turned on as she knew he was.

Peeta's mouth moved farther down her body and kissed her inner thigh. He looked questioningly into her eyes. And before he got an answer, he pressed his mouth into her.

Her head rolled to the side. _There it is_. She thought. Not as intense as it could have been, but as his tongue played over her, her body started humming. The tension didn't build much, but it did enough. And then she met her release with a soft sigh.

He kissed his way back up her body, pausing at her breasts, taking his time exploring their familiar landscape. He continued up her body. He hovered over her, kissing her lips softly over and over. He whispered her name and told her several times he loved her.

He pushed himself inside her slowly. "You okay?" he asked softly.

"Fine." She answered just as softly. She trailed her fingers over his back and sides.

He started moving, continuing to kiss her and whisper his love for her. After a while, he started moving faster and grunting with every thrust. His voice got louder as he came closer. And then he yelled something that sounded a little like her name, but she wasn't entirely sure.

He panted and looked down at her for a moment before he collapsed on his back beside her.

She turned her head and watched him for a while as he stared at the ceiling and regained his faculties.

His hand found hers. "Did we make a baby?"

"Is that all you care about?" She snapped.

He turned his head, contrite. "No, of course not."

She gave him a look of contempt. "No. It's going to take a while for that to be possible." She sat up and went to the dresser to find her pajamas.

"Hey. Don't get like that."

"Like what? Get upset that the only reason you want to sleep with me now is that I might get pregnant?" She pulled on her clothes. "I know that you want it, okay? Do you have to remind me every time we do it?"

"What do you want, Katniss?"

"To not be scared anymore." She said desperately and sagged against the wall. "It's what it always comes back to. I'm scared, Peeta. I don't know if I'll ever get better. And the nightmares…" She pushed away from the wall and started pacing. "I know I said I wanted them too. When I held Maggie, I could imagine holding our own child. But then it all comes back." She shook her head. "We can do it. I know we can, but…"

Peeta sat and watched her as she rambled on. He knew what she was saying. He had those feelings too.

"Say something." She snapped.

"You don't want a baby, that's fine. But don't bite my head off every time I mention it." He picked up his pants off the floor and put them on. "It could heal you. You don't know. You're just too scared. Well, you know what? I'm scared too. I'm scared of losing you. And I'm scared of what it could do to us. But you wanna know something else? It's all I've ever wanted. Ever since that first day of school, I wanted to be your husband and the father of your children. I didn't care about the Games. I knew that if we could just make it through…" He shook his head. "You don't give a damn about what I'm saying, though, do you?"

"Of course I do." She stared at him. "We're going in circles. It's the same fight every time. I say these same words every time. We're both just too stubborn to give in completely." She sat down on the foot of the bed. "And I'm too fickle to keep to one decision."

"No babies." He said softly.

"No trying to prevent them."

He sat beside her. "What do you mean?"

"We'll stop trying to actively prevent it like before. But I don't want to look at a calendar to determine when we should make love. We'll do it when the mood strikes. And if it happens, it happens. But I don't want to hear you say another word about it one way or the other unless I say it first. Are we agreed?"

"Agreed." He leaned his head against hers. "I'm sorry, Katniss. I love you. I really do."

"I know you do. And I know how much this hurts you."

"I'm fine."

"No, you're not."

He sighed. "You're right." He sat up. "I'm feeling that pull to want to…" He got up suddenly and walked away several steps. "Do you feel safe with me?"

"Yes."

"That's a lie. I could snap and kill you."

She smirked. "You know I'd fight back."

He let out a soft chuckle. "I know."

"I'm too tired to fight anymore tonight. Can we finish this in the morning?"

He nodded. "Yeah."

Katniss stretched out on her back and watched Peeta change. He turned out the light and then stood by the bed for a while.

She rolled to her side. "Come here and stop being so creepy. I need you beside me to sleep."

He got in beside her. He rested a hand on her hip. "I'm sorry about before, sweetheart."

"Don't apologize. We're both at fault." She moved closer to him and rested her hand on his cheek. "I love you."

He smiled, "I love you, too." He kissed the tip of her nose.

She snuggled closer, pushing him on his back. She wrapped her arms around him and rested her head on his shoulder. She sighed.

He chuckled and kissed her forehead. He combed his fingers through her hair until he fell asleep.


	11. Chapter 11

Katniss wasn't ready for today. It was her birthday. She hadn't really liked birthdays for a long time, especially when she was a kid and another birthday meant another year of Reapings. And ever since the end of the Games and the battle that took so many lives, it meant another year she was here and so many others weren't, especially Prim.

She needed this hunt more for the fresh air than the actual game. There was enough meat packed away in their freezer. But she couldn't be in the house when Peeta was working so hard to get a cake made and cooking a big supper for her. They'd invited Haymitch, Hazelle, and Posy over for the event.

The weeks had been going by so quickly. She still struggled with Peeta's want of a baby. She still went back and forth on it. Today was one of the days when she thought having a baby wouldn't be so bad. She hated having a birthday for herself. She hated that another year was passing without helping her husband achieve his dream of being a father.

She wandered into the house with a full game bag slung over her shoulder. Peeta stood over the counter, beating something in a bowl. He stopped and turned, sensing her more than hearing her.

He smiled, "Hey, there's the birthday girl."

She groaned. "Do you have to remind me?"

"Come on, twenty-nine isn't that bad."

"You would know." She walked over and kissed him softly. "The cake smells good."

"Just finishing the frosting while it cools." He got a dollop on his finger and held it out. "Tell me if it's any good."

She smiled playfully at him before she leaned forward and wrapped her mouth around his finger. She wrapped her tongue around it and sucked a moment before she pulled back.

The action seemed to cause Peeta some discomfort. "Any good?" he asked breathlessly.

"I don't know." Katniss reached for the hem of his shirt and pulled it over his head.

He watched her as she dipped her finger into the frosting and wiped in on his collarbone. She leaned forward and licked it off, nipping lightly at his skin.

He moaned, "Katniss."

She kissed up his neck and met his lips in a soft kiss. "Delicious." She purred.

"I guess I should try it." He said against her lips. He pulled her shirt off over her head.

She reached for more frosting and smeared it between her breasts. She grinned and held her finger out.

He sucked the icing off her finger and then bent down to lick the sweetness from her flesh. He reached behind her to unhook her bra as he did so, dropping it onto the floor with both their shirts.

Katniss let out a soft sigh as his mouth moved over to cover her breasts in gentle kisses.

He smeared more icing over her body and removed it with his tongue, nibbling at her skin and pressing her back against the counter. He pushed at her pants as his mouth moved lower. They dropped to the floor and he smoothed his hands down her thighs, looking up into her eyes.

She smiled and combed her fingers through his hair.

He smiled back and kissed her hip. He trailed soft kisses back up her body, licking at a few spots of frosting he'd missed. He kissed her mouth softly.

She pushed him back against the other counter and gave him the same treatment with the frosting, smearing it over his skin and then licking it away.

He groaned and reached for the button on his pants.

"Someone's eager." She commented, dropping to her knees in front of him. She pulled his pants down, releasing his erection. She sat back and looked up at him seductively before she reached for the bowl of frosting once more.

He chuckled and stroked himself as she swirled her finger around in the bowl.

"So?" She asked, holding up her finger swathed in the thick, sweet concoction.

"Do it, sweetheart." He encouraged. He stroked her face lightly with his fingertips.

She ran her frosting-coated finger over his length and leaned forward, licking him base to tip.

Peeta put his head back and groaned.

She closed her mouth over the tip and sucked, circling her tongue around him.

"Katniss." He moaned again, putting his hands on her shoulders.

She lifted her head and smiled up at him, biting her lip uncertainly.

He lifted her to her feet and pulled her to him fiercely, covering her mouth with his. Their mouths opened simultaneously, their tongues fought for dominance and Peeta stumbled forward a few steps and pinned Katniss against the island.

Her hands roamed over his back and rested on his bottom. She squeezed it slightly and wrapped a leg around his.

He moaned. "Do you want me, Katniss?"

"Mm-hm." She kissed him. "I want all of you. Make love to me."

He kissed her and then turned her in his arms. He kissed her shoulder; moved her hair to the side and kissed her neck.

She pressed back against him with a soft moan.

He nipped at her ear and then growled softly. "Like this, sweetheart? Right here?"

"Right here." She bent forward and curled her fingers around the edge of the counter. She smiled seductively over her shoulder at him.

He slipped himself inside her slowly. He slid out and then back in almost lazily.

Katniss let out a low moan as he moved within her. Her head went back with a sigh. "Faster, Peeta." She begged.

He complied, gripping her hips. He grunted with every thrust.

She replied with her own moans.

He gripped her hips even tighter as he increased his speed even more.

She could feel the bruises forming already, but she didn't care. Her fingernails dug into the counter. Her moans turned into cries that only increased in volume as the tension rose within her. She met her climax with an incoherent shout.

Peeta was right on her heels, saying her name softly. He loosened his grip and stroked his thumbs against her flesh.

"I love you." He said softly.

She slumped against the counter and mumbled, "I love you."

After a few more moments, Peeta stepped back.

Katniss pushed herself up slowly and turned to face him. A smile played on her lips. "Is there any of that frosting left?"

He chuckled and picked up the bowl. "A little." He got a dollop on his finger. He examined her for several seconds and then stepped forward. He held it out.

She leaned forward and licked the icing off. "Why are you so handsome?" She asked as she leaned back once more.

He shrugged. "I don't think I am."

"Of course you are." She trailed her fingers down his cheek.

He smiled and kissed her softly. "What would you like to do now?"

"Shower." She said with a grin.

"Do you want me to join you?"

"Only if you want to. But I'm going to really just shower. Remember, we invited people over for supper. I also need to clean my game." She kissed him. "I guess you can come with me."

"I need to make more frosting. You ate it all."

" _I_ ate it all? You started it." She teased.

"I think you were the one who put the icing on me first, sweetheart." He kissed her, holding her close. He trailed his fingers over her skin.

A knock on the door interrupted them.

"Who is it?" Peeta called, pulling on his pants and walking toward the front of the house.

"Haymitch." The voice said from the other side of the door.

Katniss gathered their clothes from the floor and scurried up the stairs before her husband opened the door.

* * *

"So is everything set for the wedding next week?" Katniss asked later as they gathered for supper.

Haymitch grumbled.

Hazelle elbowed him in the ribs. "I've still got a few things to finish up. Final fittings for all the dresses and suits will happen when Gale, Annie, and the kids get here. They're still staying with you, right?"

"Yes." Peeta answered. "And Posy can stay here as long as she needs to when you two go on your honeymoon."

"Thank you." Hazelle said, relieved. "I know she's old enough to be by herself, but I'd much rather know she's with people who can look after her."

Posy rolled her eyes. "I'd be fine, Mother."

"I know. But I don't want to risk it."

"Haymitch said he was fine with me staying at his house. It's going to be ours anyway. Why can't I just start the move?"

"Because I want you to stay with Katniss and Peeta. Finn and Maggie will be here, too."

"Finn and Maggie are kids."

"I'm not having this argument with you here, Posy. We'll discuss it later."

"Yeah, yeah."

"Hey, Posy." Haymitch said. "It won't be so bad. And I _would_ like you to get your room set up. I'm sure you mother will be fine with that. Just spend the night here, okay? Is that okay?" The last he asked his betrothed who nodded once with a smile.

Peeta and Katniss exchanged a look.

"Stop it." Haymitch snapped at them. "I can be nice. You know that."

They exchanged another look and then glared at Haymitch. As one they said, "Stay alive."

"I was in a bad place then." He said, contrite. "Hazelle fixed me. So did this one." He pinched Posy's cheek. "So don't judge me for something I said thirteen years ago."

Peeta smiled reassuringly at his former mentor. He changed the subject. "So, wedding preparations."

Hazelle and Posy took over the rest of the conversation. Peeta contributed a little. Mostly Katniss and Haymitch were bored and only spoke when spoken to.

Peeta brought out the cake a short time later, covered in the frosting he threw together as Katniss showered. She blew out the candles, thinking of the fate of the first batch of icing her husband had made. She looked into Peeta's eyes and swiped some of the frosting off the side of the cake. She dabbed it on his nose and winked.

He laughed. "Happy birthday, Katniss."

"Thank you, Peeta." She said softly.

Everyone else chorused their birthday wishes and then they dug into the cake.


	12. Chapter 12

_Katniss walked silently through the forest. She had her bow in her hand. The forest was oddly quiet. None of her traps that she'd set held any game either._

_And then she heard a sound that was a little unfamiliar at first. Then she realized what it was: a crying baby. She stalked slowly forward. She knew that the sound of a cougar sometimes sounded like a crying baby. Maybe she had one in her last trap._

_When she got to the trap, though, it wasn't a cougar. It wasn't an animal of any kind. It was an actual baby._

Katniss awoke with a start. Already the nightmare was starting to fade. She rolled over and reached out and placed her hand on Peeta's chest.

Peeta smiled at her touch. He placed his hand on top of hers.

"Are you awake?" She asked softly.

He mumbled, "Maybe."

She sighed and curled into his side. "I had another nightmare. That's almost every night for the past couple weeks."

"Just a dream, sweetheart." He said as he wrapped his arms around her.

"I know." She paused. "I don't feel so good."

She felt him shift under her. "Katniss?"

"I don't know." She let out a long breath. "The nightmare must have made me sick to my stomach. I don't even remember it anymore."

"Are you okay?"

She turned her head and looked at her husband. She smiled slightly, "I'm fine."

He kissed her forehead. "Are you going to go back to sleep?"

"I don't think so."

"You want me to make you some breakfast, then?"

"When are you going over to the bakery?"

He smirked, "Whenever I want. I'm the boss." He kissed her and then got out of bed. He reached over and fiddled with the alarm for a moment. It was almost five.

"Just something simple, Peeta. Don't go crazy." She called after him.

"I know."

Katniss smiled and rolled onto her back and stared at the ceiling. It had been just a few days since the incident in the kitchen on her birthday. Since then, their lovemaking had been a lot more sedate and traditional. But she had enjoyed it nonetheless.

She felt another wave of nausea like earlier and closed her eyes. She breathed deeply through her nose as she tried to calm her roiling stomach. But this time it didn't settle. She hurried out of the bed and into the bathroom.

"Katniss?" Peeta asked softly from the doorway.

Katniss leaned back against the bathtub. "I'm okay."

"You sure?"

She nodded and then paused. She hoisted herself up over the toilet again and heaved. Nothing came up. There was nothing there.

Peeta kneeled down beside her. "If you want me to stay home today—"

"No, you have to finish the cake. The wedding is only a few more days away."

"Are you sure?" He smoothed his hand over her hair.

She smiled and nodded. "I'll be fine, Peeta."

He kissed her forehead. "You'll call if you need anything?"

"I will."

"Good. I have a plate for you sitting beside the bed."

"Then I'll clear out so you can shower and head over to work."

"I love you."

"I know." She smiled and squeezed his hand before she left the room, closing the door behind her.

She paused in the bedroom. On the table on her side of the bed sat a plate of scrambled eggs and a cup of tea. She walked over and regarded the breakfast he'd made for her. She suddenly wasn't very hungry. And the thought of eating scrambled eggs turned her stomach anew.

She picked up the plate and carried it downstairs, holding it away from her slightly. She sat the plate on the floor and called softly to Buttercup, who she knew was lurking somewhere. She picked up a roll off the counter and returned to the bedroom.

She sipped the tea and nibbled on the roll as she listened to Peeta in the bathroom. He was singing something familiar. She smiled and was taken back to the cave all those years ago when he had confessed that his love for her had started their first day of school when she had sung that song he was singing now.

She got out of the bed and walked into the bathroom with him. She joined in the singing as she undressed and stepped into the shower.

He smiled and wrapped his arms around her. "Feeling better?"

She nodded and pressed a kiss to his lips. "But I gave the eggs to Buttercup. I'm sorry. I wasn't up for eggs. I ate one of the leftover rolls from last night."

He gave her a concerned look. "Katniss—"

She cut him off with a kiss. "Sorry."

"I'm not upset, sweetheart. I'm worried."

"No need to be. I'm fine. Now go finish getting ready. That cake won't decorate itself." She kissed him again and then shoved past him to get under the shower spray.

He ran a hand down her side before he stepped out of the shower.

* * *

Peeta heard the bell over the front door ring. He was expecting Haymitch and Hazelle to come by to check the progress of the cake. He walked into the front of the shop and saw Katniss chatting kindly with Vick over the counter.

She looked up and met his eyes. She smiled and he could see there was something bothering her. He walked over.

"Stop flirting with my wife, Vick." He teased.

The younger man blushed and mumbled an apology.

Peeta clapped him on the shoulder. "There are some cakes that need to be taken out of the oven. Will you get them for me please?"

He nodded and pushed into the back of the bakery.

He walked around the counter and sat Katniss down at a table in the corner. It was the one he usually chose for consultations. "So what's up, sweetheart?"

"I can't just stop in to see my husband at work in the middle of the day?" she asked, trailing a hand down his arm.

"Not when I know something's wrong." He caught her hand and brought it to his lips. "Tell me."

She kissed his hands one at a time and then placed her hands on the side of his face. She kissed him softly. "I love you. And everything I do is for you. I only ever want to make you happy. You know that, right?"

He nodded. "Same here."

"Even when it means I'm doing something a little terrifying."

"What are you saying?"

"Peeta—"

The bell over the door rang again and they both looked up. Haymitch and Hazelle stepped inside the shop.

"I'll be right with you." Peeta assured them. He looked back to his wife. "You want to see the cake?"

She nodded. "As long as it's okay with the happy couple?" She asked the older pair with a smile.

"Fine by me." Haymitch said. "I don't really care about what the cake looks like, just what it tastes like. And I still have to wait a few days for that."

They all walked to the back of the bakery. Vick waved at his mother when she greeted him.

"Oh, Peeta, it looks wonderful." Hazelle said. "Thank you. It's almost too pretty to eat."

"Yeah, right." Haymitch said. "It's pretty, but I want to eat it right now."

Katniss laughed. "I agree."

"Right on, sweetheart." Haymitch said, clapping her on her shoulder. "I'll just be glad when this wedding is over."

"That's when all the fun really starts." Katniss said with a grin. "The fighting and all that."

"You two lived together for years before you were married. You should have gotten the fighting over."

"Well, it was kind of a big fight whether or not I changed my last name."

"I remember hearing that one. It's kind of odd when a man _doesn't_ want his wife to take his last name."

Peeta shrugged. "What can I say, I'm very proud of Katniss Everdeen."

"But I'm the exact same person as Katniss Mellark." She rested her hand on her husband's back.

"We've already had the discussion." Haymitch said. "And came to a good compromise."

"And what is that?" Vick asked, coming closer.

His mother smiled, "Hazelle Hawthorne-Abernathy. It was his idea." She nodded toward her fiancé. "There wasn't much of a fight about it. I just wanted to change my last name, but he suggested I should keep the former one attached to honor my late first husband."

"No to mention Posy overheard her saying something about changing her name and she got upset." Haymitch put in.

"Understandable. I know if my mother decided to get married to Alexander, I don't know how I'd feel. Much less is she changed her last name to Ross. Iris Ross sounds weird. She's been Iris Everdeen for so long."

"But she'll always be your mother." Hazelle assured her.

"I know." She exchanged a look with Peeta and then glanced up at the clock. "The train will be here soon. I promised Finn I'd meet them at the station." She kissed Peeta's cheek and started to leave out the back door.

He caught her hand, "Hey, you came here to tell me something."

"I did." She looked between the others in the room who all mumbled something about needing to be somewhere else. As soon as they were gone, Katniss looked down at her hands as she twisted her fingers together. "You see, we're… You ready to try out this baby thing again?"

He smiled and smoothed his hand over her hair. "I'm in if you are."

"Good. We have a little over seven months to figure it all out." She leaned into him and buried her eyes in his neck. "I just pray it works out this time. I don't know if I can handle losing it again."

He wrapped his arms around her. "I know." He kissed her. "I love you, Katniss. We can do this."

"Let's not say anything yet, though. This week is for Haymitch and Hazelle."

"I agree."

She lifted her head and kissed him. She had a smile on her face. "We'll celebrate tonight."

He smirked. "Practice at how quiet we can be?"

"Exactly." She kissed him softly. "Want me to bring them by to say hi?"

"Just bring them home. I'm sure they'll be tired. I'll close up early today."

She nodded. "Will you stop by the market on the way home and get some potatoes and carrots? I'll start some squirrel for stew."

"Sounds good." He kissed her again. "See you in a bit."

"Bye." She squeezed his hand and then left.


	13. Chapter 13

Peeta walked into his house to the sound of Finn laughing happily. He also heard the sound of a baby laughing and knew that he and Maggie must be entertaining each other.

But when he walked into the living room, he saw that it was Katniss entertaining them both. She was spinning Maggie around over her head as she squealed with glee. And for some reason, Finn seemed to think this was funny as well.

Katniss saw him come into the room and gathered the baby to her chest. She smiled at him. Then he noticed that Annie and Gale weren't there.

"I told them to go lie down." Katniss explained when he asked their whereabouts. "They looked exhausted."

"I bet they were." He patted Finn's shoulder. "Hey, kid. How was the trip?"

"Good." He said with a smile. "But Mom's not feeling so well. Maggie cried for a lot of the trip and Dad walked up and down the train with her almost the entire time."

"No wonder they were tired." He took the baby from his wife's arms. "Hello, Mags." He kissed her hair and rubbed her back as she rested on his shoulder. She let out a soft sigh and then pushed herself back. "What?"

"Peeta." She said happily.

"Yeah, you remembered."

Katniss kissed his cheek. "Did you get the potatoes and carrots?"

"In the kitchen, sweetheart. You want me to run across the road and warn the others?"

"Can I do it?" Finn asked.

"Sure thing, kid." Peeta said.

Gale walked into the room as Finn bolted out the door. He ran his hand through his hair and yawned.

Peeta shook his hand. "Hey, man. How's it going?"

"Pretty good. I heard her laughing in here." He ran a hand over his daughter's back.

"Your friend's doing. Not mine. You want her?"

"She's fine where she is. She really likes you."

Maggie rubbed her face on Peeta's shoulder and babbled softly.

"Well, I like her too." He sat down on a chair and gestured for Gale to sit on the adjacent sofa.

"I'm glad." He rubbed his face.

"How's Annie feeling? Finn said she wasn't well."

He smiled sideways, "She'll be fine. Nothing a little time won't cure."

Peeta gave him a puzzled look.

"We'll be welcoming a new addition to our family."

"Congratulations." He smiled and looked over his shoulder toward the kitchen. "Can you keep a secret?" he asked softly.

"You know I can."

"So are we. Welcoming a new addition, that is."

"And I take it Katniss didn't want you to say anything yet."

He shook his head and smoothed down Maggie's hair. "She doesn't really want it."

"She likes mine well enough."

He shrugged and kissed the little girl's forehead.

Annie came into the room then.

"Mama!" Maggie exclaimed, struggling in Peeta's grasp.

He sat her down on the floor and she crawled to her mother, pulling herself up on Annie's legs.

She picked her up. "Hey, baby." She kissed her chubby cheek as she walked to sit beside her husband. "Where's Finn?"

"Across the street getting Haymitch and Hazelle." Peeta explained. "And the others."

She nodded. "So what were you two talking about in here?"

They hesitated.

"You told him?" Annie asked. "I thought we were going to tell everyone at the same time."

"You know I couldn't hold it in that long." He draped his arm over her shoulder. "And anyway, Peeta and I were bonding over mutual good news."

Annie looked at Peeta. "You and Katniss, too?"

He nodded and looked over his shoulder. "But pretend you don't know. We weren't going to tell anyone for a while."

"No problem." Gale said.

"Yeah, of course." Annie agreed.

"You two can be the ones with all the good news. I'm sure your mom will just love knowing she's going to be a grandmother again." Peeta said with a smile, relaxing.

Annie stood. "I'm going to see if Katniss wants any help in the kitchen." She looked at Maggie. "You want to come with Mama?"

The girl nodded enthusiastically and the two left the room.

Peeta turned to his wife's friend. "So how far along?"

"Three months." He was beaming, but there was something lurking behind it.

"Something wrong?"

He shook his head, his smile faltering. "Nothing big."

"Well, if you want to talk, I've been told I'm a good listener. Of course I know that Katniss is your best friend, so I suppose you'd feel more comfortable with her."

"Annie wants me to talk. And I will. When I'm ready."

Peeta nodded. "You two are okay, though, right?"

"Yeah, of course." He smiled again. "It's good."

"Good." Peeta reached for the remote. "Let's see what's on."

* * *

Annie walked into the kitchen. "Do you need any help?"

"Sure. You want to start chopping carrots?" she passed over the pile and pointed out the knife drawer.

Annie strapped Mags into a high chair.

Katniss asked, "Can she have a cookie? Peeta brought some home from the bakery."

"Yeah, she loves sweets. Thank you."

She handed a cookie to the little girl and patted her on the top of the head.

"You say 'thank you', Maggie."

Maggie smiled and started gnawing on the cookie with her few teeth.

They worked in silence, the only sound in the room the knives chopping and Maggie's occasional babbles.

After a while Annie said, "Katniss, can I ask a favor?"

"What favor?"

"It's Gale. I know you two are close…The thing is, we're going through a rough patch and he won't really talk to me. We're in counseling, but there are still things he won't open up about. Could you maybe talk to him?"

"Yeah, of course."

"And I don't expect you to tell me what he said; I just want him to talk to someone."

"It's no problem, Annie. If something's bothering him, I'm sure I can get it out of him."

She relaxed, "Thanks. I really do appreciate it."

The women gathered in the kitchen after that. Katniss felt uncomfortable with all of them around, but she would endure it. She just wanted to go lie down. She'd not really felt well for most of the afternoon and the smell of the food cooking wasn't doing a lot to help. She nibbled at a piece of bread to settle her stomach as she talked.

Annie had started giving her odd looks of concern. Was she transparent? At least Hazelle seemed to be ignoring anything if she sensed it. Posy was completely oblivious as was Vick's latest girlfriend Kathy; both of whom were cooing over Maggie.

"This will be done soon." Katniss assured them, moving to sit at the kitchen table. She let out a long breath.

Annie sat down beside her and smiled encouragingly.

That's when she knew for sure. She cursed under her breath. Hazelle and the girls looked at her curiously. She smiled kindly and joined in the conversation.

After a while, she called the men in from the living room. They filled their plates and started to talk over each other.

Katniss mumbled to Peeta, "I can't believe you. You said you wouldn't say anything."

"I couldn't help it, sweetheart."

"Don't call me sweetheart right now. I'm not in the mood."

"I'm sorry." He touched her arm gently. "Please forgive me. They won't say anything. They have their own news to give."

As if on cue, Gale called for silence.

Everyone looked in his direction.

"I know that over the next few days the focus will be on Mom and Haymitch. But today, I'd like to take the spotlight for just a moment."

"Don't drag it out." Annie scolded.

He smiled at his wife. "Finn and Maggie will soon have another sibling."

Hazelle's face brightened and she rushed at her daughter-in-law, babbling excitedly and kissing her cheeks.

Everyone else spoke their congratulations. Finn looked a little lost, but brightened when his mother kissed his cheek and whispered something in his ear.

Peeta leaned over to Katniss. "Smile, sweetheart."

"We're not saying anything yet." She warned.

"Of course not. I won't steal the moment from our friends." He kissed her cheek and then turned and joined in the excitement of the baby conversation.

* * *

Peeta watched Katniss as she paced around the room. "I can't believe you're still mad at me." He said.

"Why wouldn't I be? We weren't going to say anything. And then you blab to Gale and Annie." She snapped.

"Like you wouldn't have told Gale." He snapped back. "He's your best friend. You would have confided in him."

"I don't know. Maybe."

"'Maybe.'" He repeated.

She turned at glared at him. "It's my body. It's my business."

"It's my baby." He pointed out.

"A baby that I'd just as soon not have and you know it."

"Do you know how much that hurts me? That you don't want a family with me? A life with me?"

"We have a life."

"An incomplete one." He gave her a pleading look. "Please just try to be happy about this. Or at least be content. For me. Do this for me."

She chewed on her lower lip and glared at him. She could feel herself softening. "Damn you."

He chuckled. "You can't stay angry with me forever."

She looked away, trying not to smile, though she felt it tugging at the corners of her mouth. "Maybe I hate you a little."

"Come to bed. You promised we'd celebrate. So I told a couple people. They won't say anything. They're too excited about their own baby."

She hesitated and then walked over to the bed. She sat down beside him. "I'm trying to be happy about this. I really am. But you know—"

"I do." He pulled her close. "But it's okay. It will be. You're going to be a great mother, I can tell. You're already so great with Maggie and Finn."

"I don't want the nightmares anymore." She said desperately, pressing her eyes into his neck.

"I know."

She sat up and looked at him a moment. "You've been better."

"Yeah." He pushed her hair back and brought her face closer for a kiss. "I think it's the bakery."

She kissed him and murmured against his lips, "I want you."

"I'd like to help with that." He slipped his hands under the hem of her shirt.

She pushed his hands away. "Not so fast there. I have a proposition for you."

"A proposition? And what would that be?"

She kissed him again. "Sort of a competition."

"A sexy competition?"

"Exactly." Katniss sat back and pulled off her shirt. "Whoever can hold off the longest wins."

Peeta slid his hands up her back and pulled her closer. "And what is the prize?"

"If you win, you can tell whoever you want about the baby. And I'll even tell my mother. If I win, we keep our mouths shut about it until I'm ready."

"And you're okay with that?"

"I wouldn't have suggested it if I wasn't."

He smiled and pulled his own shirt off. He rolled her onto her back. "I accept your wager, Mrs. Mellark."

"Good, Mr. Mellark. Now get on with the lovemaking."

He chuckled and kissed her softly. "But you have to reign yourself in. There are other people in the house now."

"What are you accusing me of?" She asked as she slid her hands down his back.

"You know very well what I'm accusing you of." He shifted as she pushed his pants down his hips.

"Well, you're not very quiet yourself." She pushed him onto his back. "So you need to watch it too."

He chuckled again. "Help me get these pants off already." He hooked a finger in the waistband of her pants. "And then you take yours off."

"So ready to get going? That doesn't seem like a winning attitude to me." She pulled his pants off and threw them away. She stood and slowly finished undressing.

He stroked himself as he watched her.

She smiled and kneeled down beside him, placing her hand over his. She leaned over and flicked her tongue over his tip. She smiled as he groaned and leaned his head back. She closed her mouth over him for a moment and ten stood. She slid her hands up his body as she moved to straddle him.

"I love you." He said softly, moving his hands over his body.

She smiled and kissed him. "I love you, too. And I _do_ want this baby."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah." She kissed him again.

He placed his hand on her stomach. He looked at where his fingers touched her flesh. "I am so sorry for about what your mother and I are about to do."

"No, you're not." She chuckled and guided him inside, settling down over him.

He rested his hands on her thighs as she leaned forward and rested hers on his chest. He pushed her up and then guided her back down.

They set up a steady rhythm after that, both of them struggling to keep their voices down. Katniss groaned low in her throat and leaned down to kiss him. Their mouths opened simultaneously and they let their voices blend together as they drew closer.

Katniss sat back, rotating her hips as she moved up and down. She was on the brink, she knew. And though she knew she could hold off just a little longer, she decided she didn't want to. She gasped as she went over the cliff, letting the waves fall over her.

And Peeta was only a few strokes behind her. He grunted just before his release, gripping her hips almost as hard as he had the afternoon in the kitchen. He loosened his grip and lay back panting.

"You win." She said, brushing her hair away from her face.

"You let me." He stroked his thumbs over her thighs.

"Maybe I did. Maybe I don't care who knows."

"You _do_ care." He sat up and kissed her. "Just tell your mother. That's all I want."

She nodded and kissed him again. "I'll call her first chance I get."

"Good."

"I don't care that you told Gale and Annie. I was going to tell him when we went hunting tomorrow anyway."

He kissed her again. "I love you."

"And I love you." She combed her fingers through his hair. "More than I can ever say."


	14. Chapter 14

Katniss woke up in a cold sweat. The dream was fading, but the feeling was still there. She closed her eyes and drew up pictures of more pleasant things. She pictured Peeta baking bread and could almost smell it.

"You okay?" Peeta asked softly.

She opened her eyes and saw her husband standing beside her. He had a plate of fresh bread slices smeared with butter. She smiled and sat up. She took one of the slices of bread off the plate before he sat it down on the nightstand.

"I'm better now." She took a bite. "It's ridiculously early. Why are you up? And why is there fresh bread? Not that I'm complaining."

He lowered himself to the edge of the bed. "I had trouble sleeping. So I got up and started baking."

"You didn't sleep at all?"

He shook his head. "I, uh…watched you sleep for a while. And then I started feeling like I wanted to kill you. And I got scared." He wasn't looking at her now. "I didn't want to hurt you or our baby."

She reached out and placed her hand on his arm. "It's okay, Peeta. It happens."

"It hasn't in a long time." He looked at her, anguish written all over his face. "I'm sorry."

"I am, too." She pulled him to her for a kiss. "But it's okay. You need some sleep."

"You're going out with Gale and Finn to hunt?"

She nodded. "If we can get Finn up. Gale and I are definitely going out."

He placed his hand on her stomach. "Be careful."

She put her hand on top of his. "I will be." She kissed him again. "Get some sleep, Peeta."

"I have to go open the bakery."

"No, you don't. Close it up for today."

"Only if you would stay in bed with me all day."

She chuckled, "We have company." She kissed him again. "I love you. And I want you to at least take a nap before you go in. It's not going to kill your reputation to open late just one day. Everyone knows we've got a lot going on this week."

"I guess you're right. I mostly have to go in and do a few finishing touches on the cake."

"Of course I'm right. I'm always right. And even when I'm wrong, I'm the Mockingjay, my word is law."

He laughed. He kissed her again. "Let me make love to you."

"No time."

As if on cue, there was a tap on the door and Gale called softly, "Hey, Catnip, we hunting or not?"

"Give me ten minutes, Gale." She called back. She kissed Peeta once more and then headed for the bathroom for a quick shower.

* * *

They walked quietly through the forest. Well, Katniss and Gale did. Finn tried, but he seemed to find all the sticks to snap in the underbrush. The sound scared the animals into running and Katniss was able to shoot a couple squirrels.

"We'd have a lot more success if your stepson would learn to have lighter feet." Katniss teased.

"Sorry." Finn said, turning red with mortification.

She draped her arm over his shoulder. "I'm kidding. It comes with lot of practice. I was pretty loud out here myself. So was Gale."

The boy nodded. Then he pointed. "What's that?"

"A snare." Gale said as he moved forward to inspect it. "Still not as good as mine."

"Of course not." Katniss said. "But at least I can make them. Teach your boy how to do it. I'm going to inspect some of the others." She gave the boy's shoulder a playful punch. "Maybe I'll actually get some game worth taking home."

She wandered off on silent feet. Finn watched in awe.

Gale nudged him. "She's taken."

He reddened again. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"Sure, you don't." He looked at the trap. "Whatever was in this was eaten by something else." He indicated the bones scattered near the trap.

"Why do you call her Catnip?"

"Because I thought that's what she said her name was." He patiently showed Finn how to make the trap and watched as he tried to copy. "She was a quiet little thing when we first met." He said, continuing the conversation as they worked. "But she's found her voice."

"You were in love with her?"

"Once upon a time." He looked over his head and smiled. "But her heart always belonged elsewhere."

"Talking about someone I know?" Katniss asked.

"Only my best friend in all Panem." Gale said with a smile. "How did you do?"

"I have a usurping predator." She held up the game bag. "But I got a few and reset the snares. This should be enough." She smiled. "Berries?"

"Yes." Both guys said at once.

She let them to the berry patch and they ate their fill and then filled the pail Katniss had brought to bring the berries home.

Finn walked a little ahead on the way back into town.

Gale looked sideways at his friend. "You okay?"

She nodded. "Mostly."

"Annie's been a little better this time around."

"That's good. I remember how hard it was before."

"Are you scared?" He asked so softly, she wasn't sure she heard it.

"Terrified." She said just as softly.

He nodded. Then he draped his arm across her shoulder. "You'll be okay. You have Peeta."

"What if I lose this one, too? I don't know if I can do this again. And the nightmares have been worse these last few nights."

"They're just dreams, Katniss."

"They're memories, Gale." She started at Finn as he trudged noisily ahead. "I dreamed about Finnick's death last night. I forgot it as soon as I woke up, but it started coming back as soon as I saw his son this morning." She shrugged off his arm. "I'll be fine."

"I know you will be."

They headed home where they found Peeta and Annie working together in the kitchen to make breakfast. Maggie sat in a playpen in a far corner, playing quietly. Katniss sat the game bag beside the door as Gale gathered Annie in his arms to kiss her sweetly in greeting.

Finn excitedly told his mother about the hunting trip. He didn't seem too upset that he scared away all the game. Annie listened intently, touching her son's hair as he spoke.

Katniss watched the family. She felt Peeta walk up to her side and she turned her head. "I want that."

"We'll have it." He assured her. He kissed her cheek. "Did you bring berries?"

She indicated the pail. "And the three of us already ate most of the berry patch, so you and Annie can have all you want." She kissed him suddenly. "I love you."

"I love you." He rested his forehead against hers. "You look tired."

"I am a little."

"Then why don't you go stretch out on the couch?"

She nodded. "I'll get that meat ready later."

"I can skin what we got." Gale said, picking up the bag. "There's not much. Finn can help me. Come on, kid."

Maggie started crying as they left. Annie walked over and picked her up.

"It's okay, baby. Daddy will be back in soon." She assured the little girl. She kissed her. "Now, you go back and play so Mama can finish helping Peeta with breakfast."

She surprised everyone by holding her arms out to Katniss. "Kat?"

"Me?" Katniss asked. "You want me?"

Annie said, "You don't have to, Katniss. She'll be fine."

"No, I'll take her. We can find what's on TV fit for little girls." She took Maggie from Annie's arms and kissed her temple. "Hello, there, Mags." She walked into the living room, humming softly.

She sat down on the couch and lifted her feet up onto the coffee table. She flipped through the channels a few times before she gave up and turned it off.

"Sorry, kiddo, nothing worth watching." She sat Maggie out from her a little and clapped her hands. "What are your thoughts on the new baby? Hm? You excited to be a big sister?"

Maggie giggled and clapped her hands clumsily.

"Good to know." She smiled. "Your parents are pretty happy about it, too."

The baby babbled for a while. Katniss heard a few things that sounded like real words. She nodded as though she was listening to a grand tale. Then Mags suddenly stopped babbling and gave Katniss a very serious look.

"You're right." She said. "You should never make an investment like that without knowing all the facts. I think you made the right choice."

Maggie laughed like Katniss had said the funniest thing ever. She clapped her hands and then collapsed forward against the woman's chest. Katniss pulled her closer and then started singing softly.

 _Deep in the meadow, under the willow_  
A bed of grass, a soft green pillow  
Lay down your head, and close your sleepy eyes  
And when again they open, the sun will rise.

She continued the song, getting louder without realizing it. She saw out of the corner of her eye that someone was watching. She turned her head. Finn stood there.

"Sorry. I didn't mean…"

"No, it's okay."

Maggie sat up. "Finn!" she exclaimed.

"Hey, Mags." He sat down beside Katniss and held out his hand to his sister. "I've heard you sing that song before."

"Yeah?"

He nodded. "We watch highlights of the Games sometimes for school. They showed us when you sang it to that girl that died."

"Rue." She smoothed a hand over the Maggie's hair. "That was a hard day."

"They say that was a turning point for you."

"The whole thing was." She looked at the boy beside her. "Do you like learning about the Games?"

He shrugged. "I feel like a lot of the time, it's the only way I know my dad."

"There are better ways to get to know him." She said softly.

"Mom still doesn't talk about him much. It hurts Gale's feelings because when she thinks about him, she goes away. And then he feels like he isn't good enough."

"And who told you that?"

"I overheard them talking about it. Well, fighting about it."

"Anything that happens between your parents isn't your fault." Katniss assured him.

"I know."

"I didn't know him as well as your mom did, but I knew him well enough. I can talk about him with you if you want."

He smiled. "Thanks."

"So, I thought you were helping with the skinning."

"It was too gross. And I was in the way. Dad was having fun at it, though."

"That's good, I guess." She clapped Maggie's hands together. "You can talk to me about whatever you want, you know. Not just about Finnick. I'll keep my mouth shut. Even to Gale."

"You promise?"

"Promise."

Peeta walked up behind her and kissed the top of her head. "You want some breakfast, sweetheart?"

"I'm not really hungry."

"I am." Finn stood up.

"Finn." Maggie said, reaching for her brother.

"Come on, Mags." He plucked her from Katniss's lap.

As they walked out of the room, Peeta asked, "You still think you won't be good at being a mother."

"I'm just…" She put her hand on her stomach. "I just want it to be over."

"And miss all the fun of the morning sickness and the swollen ankles?"

She chuckled and looked up at him. "That too."

He kissed her forehead.

"I want to prove that I can do it."

"I know you can, sweetheart. Now, come and sit with us at least."

"Okay."


	15. Chapter 15

"Why haven't you said anything yet?" Peeta asked as he barged into the bathroom.

Katniss stuck her head outside the shower curtain and glared at him. "Excuse me, I'm kind of trying to shower here."

"You said you'd tell your mother."

"I did." She snapped the curtain back.

"So?" He leaned against the wall. "Why haven't you yet?"

"I wanted to tell her in person. She'll be here in an hour. And why does it matter to you anyway?"

"I don't know. Maybe I'd like my mother-in-law to know that I knocked up her daughter."

Katniss turned off the shower and stepped out. She wrapped a towel around herself. Peeta was happy to see she had a smile on her face.

"I want to tell everyone, you know that." He said softly.

"I do. I also know that everyone has a lot going on. Haymitch and Hazelle are getting married tonight. Annie and Gale already announced their baby's imminent arrival. I just want this to be ours. And I don't want anyone thinking that we're just trying to take over the spotlight. We're still the Star-Crossed Lovers of District Twelve. I'm still the Mockingjay. I feel like it would be a slap in everyone's face. 'Haymitch, Hazelle! Congratulations on the wedding. By the way, did you hear Peeta and Katniss are having a baby?'" She shook her head. "I don't want to be that person. It seems like a Capitol thing to do."

"You're right." He said softly.

"I'm almost always right." She kissed him.

"'Almost always.'" He smirked.

She chuckled and kissed him again. "I love you."

"And I love you." He pulled her to him. "Do you have a minute?"

She wrapped her arms around his neck, "Yeah, but only just a minute. And I know that won't be enough for you."

"You'd be surprised, sweetheart."

"I feel like that will be completely unsatisfying." She kissed him and then stepped away. "I have so many things to do. Why did I agree to be in the bridal party?" she made a face and then walked into the bedroom.

* * *

Peeta was at the bakery finishing up the cake. The Hawthornes were visiting with the rest of the family and helping with the last of the wedding preparations.

So Katniss was alone in the house when she heard the knock at the door. She hurried down the stairs. She opened it to reveal Iris and Alexander. "Mother, I thought it would be you." She accepted her mother's hug and then extended her hand to Alexander. "Hello, Alexander. How was your trip?"

"It went well. And how are you, Katniss?" Iris answered.

"I'm fine." She looked between the pair and then said, "Could I have a word alone, Mother?"

"Sure." She squeezed her companion's hand and stepped away.

"Make yourself comfortable, Alexander." Katniss told him before they left the room.

"You're dress is pretty." Iris said as they walked into the kitchen.

She smiled. "Thank you. Hazelle and Haymitch are going all out. I'm just glad she chose one of Cinna's old designs. He really knew how to dress a woman."

She nodded. "He was a good man." She sat down at the kitchen table. "So what did you want to talk about?"

"I'm sorry." She said, sitting down next to her.

"Why are you apologizing?"

"I've been awful to you all these years. I can't apologize enough."

"Katniss…" She put her hand on top of her daughter's. "We both did a lot of wrong to each other. You're forgiven if I'm forgiven."

Katniss smiled and nodded. "Yes, you are."

"Is that what you had to tell me?"

"No." She bit her lip and looked down. "I'm…" She looked into her mother's eyes. "Peeta and I are having a baby."

"You are?" Her eyes lit up.

"Yes. We're not telling anyone just yet. Gale and Annie are too and they already made their announcement. And with the wedding… But you can tell Alexander, I don't mind."

Iris leaned over and kissed her daughter's cheek. "I'm happy for you."

"So is Peeta."

"But not you?"

"Mother… I'm just… I don't want to get excited in case I lose this one too."

She folded her daughter into her arms. It was something she'd not done since Katniss was small, but it was familiar and she melted into her mother, breathing her in.

"You're strong." Iris said softly. "You'll be fine."

"Thanks, Mom." She said, squeezing her once before she sat back. "I have to finish getting ready. Make yourselves at home."

They stood.

"What would you say if I told you I was getting married?" Iris asked.

Katniss's mouth dropped.

Iris smiled. "Only joking. But we have been talking about moving in together."

"That would be good. I like him."

"I'm glad."

* * *

Katniss paid as much attention to the wedding as possible, but she was nauseated, so it was a bit uncomfortable. She held it together until the end of the ceremony, but as soon as she was able, she ran toward the nearest bathroom.

"Katniss?" Annie called through the door. "You okay?"

She sat back on her heels. "Fine, Annie. Thank you."

"Can I get you anything? Water?"

"Water would be great." And then she lurched forward again and heaved some more into the toilet.

"Do I need to get Peeta?" She asked uncertainly.

"No, don't get him. I'm fine. Just the water."

Annie returned with another soft tap on the door.

Katniss opened it and took the offered glass. She sloshed some water around in her mouth and then spit it in the sink. She pressed the glass to her forehead as she sat on the side of the tub.

She said softly, "Thank you."

"It was nothing." Annie sat down beside her. "It pretty bad?"

"It was worse last time. I could barely get out of bed."

"No hunting?"

She shook her head and sipped the water. "And how are you?"

"I'm tired. My morning sickness is, thankfully, just in the morning. It was the same with the other two."

"Were they pretty easy?"

Annie shook her head. "Finnick died never knowing he was going to be a father. That tore me up. He wanted a baby so bad. We talked about it a lot. We even considered it at several points in our relationship. And then I lost him just when we were finally happy." She wiped at her eyes. "Carrying his son was so hard. I didn't have him. And Dale was still torn up over Mags. I had no one else really. And then with Maggie… I don't think Gale fully understands, even though he claims to. I went back to my dark days. This one's easier so far. But I've been a little distracted taking care of Maggie, so it helps. And then there's the therapy. I just wish Gale would do some one-on-one sessions like me."

"Want me to say something to him?"

"No, it would be best if you didn't." Annie smile. "He's not that bad. And we're working through a lot. But he doesn't have a lot of friends in District Two. Definitely no one as good as you. That's why I want him to talk to someone."

Katniss nodded. "Things were so much easier when we could escape to the woods."

"Or just swim in the ocean for an afternoon." Annie agreed.

"I'm glad you have each other, though." Katniss stood. "He loves you so much, Annie. He loves those kids."

"And we love him." She stood. "We'll be okay."

"Good to know."

Annie pulled her into an unexpected hug. "You're a really great friend."

Katniss hugged her back. "You too, Annie."

Annie stepped back. "Maybe our babies will be best friends like you and Gale."

"I hope so." Katniss said with a kind smile.

They joined the rest of the reception just as the newlyweds made their way to their home to perform the toasting. Peeta slipped his arm around her waist and buried his eyes in her neck for a moment.

"You okay, sweetheart?" he asked softly as he pulled back.

"Fine. Annie took care of me." She gave him a soft kiss. "Don't worry."

"I'll try." He said. He kissed her again and they watched the toasting with everyone else.

Everyone cheered as the couple kissed once more. Posy then ran to them and threw her arms around Haymitch's neck and kissed his cheek.

He chuckled and hugged her back, murmuring something in her ear as he rocked her back and forth.

She nodded and stepped back.

Haymitch kissed her forehead before he let her go.

Katniss gently elbowed Gale. "What do you think about that?"

"She never knew our dad. I'm happy Haymitch can fill that role. It's just odd."

"Yeah." She agreed.

Everyone moved forward to congratulate the couple.

Katniss was one of the last. She hugged Hazelle and then stepped up to Haymitch. She shook his hand. "Stay alive." She said with a smirk.

Haymitch threw his head back and laughed. "With these two, I don't know." He kissed Hazelle's hand and then winked at Posy who stood nearby.

"You'll be all right." She assured him. "Congratulations."

"Thanks, sweetheart."

She smiled and walked away.

Mags spotted her and lunged from her mother's arms. "Kat!" She exclaimed as Annie struggled to keep from dropping her.

"Hey, stop that, Maggie." She took the girl from Annie. "You'll fall and break your noggin."

She laughed and clapped her hands.

"It's not funny. It would be very scary."

She gave the woman a serious look.

Katniss gave her the same serious look.

Both broke into laughs.

"And who is this?" Iris asked over her shoulder.

"This little darling is Gale and Annie's daughter Mags. Mags, this is my mother. Can you say hi?"

The little girl waved.

"You _are_ a little darling." Iris crooned.

"Yeah. Maggie and I are buddies. Aren't we?"

Maggie put her head on Katniss's shoulder and smiled.

"She's so cute. I could just eat her up." Iris said, rubbing her back.

"Thank you." Gale said. "We're pretty proud of her." He had his arm around Finn's shoulder. "And this is our son, Finn. We're pretty proud of him too. Finn, this is Katniss's mother Iris Everdeen."

He held out his hand. "Nice to meet you, Mrs. Everdeen."

"You too, Finn." She shook his hand.

The group chatted for a short time before there was a hush through the crowd. All eyes turned as Peeta and Vick rolled in the cake. All jaws dropped. What stood before them was a three foot tall hawthorn tree carved out of cake. Everyone clapped.

It was almost too beautiful to eat, but eat it they did and it was delicious. Peeta was a perfect baker as well as an artist. Katniss couldn't be prouder of her talented husband.


	16. Chapter 16

"Katniss, we have company." Peeta called as he walked into the living room.

She looked up from the TV and smiled as Haymitch rounded the couch and sat beside her.

"Hey, sweetheart." He said with a smile.

Her husband kissed the top of her head. "I'm going to the bakery for a while." He patted her bulbous stomach. "You two behave."

"Which two are you talking to?" She teased.

"I'll let you figure it out." He kissed her again and then left.

Katniss rubbed her stomach and turned back to the TV. "They always make me seem like some god."

"Hm?"

She gestured. "There's always some documentary on 'The Mockingjay' and they never get me right. They make me seem like I'm so much better than I am." She clicked off the set. "So how is married life?"

"Not too much different from before except now they don't leave when it gets dark." He chuckled. "And how are you?"

"Well, I can't hunt. But other than that, I guess I'm fine."

"Can't hunt?"

"I don't know how much you know about pregnancy, but I have to pee every five minutes. Not so food for sneaking up on game. Not to mention pulling the bow can cause strain that Peeta doesn't think I need." She rolled her eyes. And I really can't get down to empty and reset snares."

"But everything else is good?"

"Has my husband been talking to you?" She pressed her hand to her stomach just under her ribs. "Hey, now."

"You okay?" Haymitch was alarmed.

"Just getting abuse from daughter." She took his hand and pressed it to the spot. "You feel it?" She smiled. "She's real."

"Of course she's real." He said in awe.

She looked at him. "You can tell everyone not to worry."

He sat back. "Now what makes you think—?"

"Haymitch, I _know_ that they are. No matter how many times I tell Peeta I'm fine, he doesn't believe me. Yeah, it's hard, of course it's hard. But I'm making it." She hoisted herself off the couch. "You can tell my husband and everyone else that if they're concerned for me, they can ask me themselves."

"What if it was me that was concerned?" He sat reached out and pulled her back down on the couch. "Look, Peeta did mention that you haven't been sleeping well. But my concern is for myself. You're like…"

"Like what?"

"I've watched you grow up." He said awkwardly. "I don't know how to open up to people, you know that."

"We're the same in that way."

"So, you see, you might as well be mine." He smiled.

She smiled back. "You got plenty of kids."

"And I count you among them, sweetheart."

She nudged his shoulder. "Are you and Hazelle going to have any of your own?"

He shook his head. "We're both too old. And we have Posy for a while longer."

"And grandkids."

"Thanks for making me feel even older." He teased.

She laughed. "You're the one who said you were too old to have more kids." She rubbed her stomach. "I'm just so glad she doesn't have to worry about death all her life."

"I'm glad Posy and Vick never had to go to the Reaping as participants. And my _grandkids_ will only learn about it from school."

"Have you heard from Annie and Gale?"

"Yep. They are doing fine. Pearl is fine." He had a note of pride in her voice. "They'll come visit in a few months."

She looked sideways at her old mentor. "You really do love them all."

"Of course I do." He looked away awkwardly. "And you too, Katniss." He leaned over and kissed her forehead and then he got up. "If you need anything, call or come over."

"I will. Thanks."

* * *

Peeta came home and found Katniss curled up on the couch. He draped a blanket over her and kissed her cheek.

Her eyes fluttered open. "Hey."

"Hey." He smiled. "I didn't mean to wake you."

"It's okay. I didn't even plan to fall asleep. I just wanted to rest my eyes for a while."

"Yeah. So what would you like me to make for supper?"

"It's my night to cook." She stretched and started to sit up.

He gently pushed her down. "Rest."

"I won't break, Peeta." She brushed off his hand and stood. "You should make some biscuits. I'll fry up some of that venison I put to thaw last night. And we'll have mashed potatoes, too."

"Okay. Whatever you want, sweetheart." He rubbed her stomach. "As long as you're sure you'll be all right."

She put her hand on top of his. "I will be."

They went to work together in the kitchen. Peeta stopped occasionally to kiss her cheek or lips or just to gaze adoringly at her. If his hands weren't covered in flour, he would touch her. But he knew she would prefer not to have her clothes covered in the white dust.

He put the biscuits in the oven and leaned back against the counter.

Katniss sat down heavily on a chair, rubbing her stomach.

"You okay?"

"Everything hurts." She said with a strained smile.

"I'll finish this. You stay there."

"Only a few more weeks."

"And?" He went back to cooking.

"I'll be relieved when she's finally here."

"Me too, but I think for different reasons."

"Yeah, probably."

"So, I've been thinking about names."

"We said we'd wait."

"I know. But we know we're having a girl. So, I started thinking."

"So tell me, then. I know you're dying to."

"Primrose." He said softly. "Primrose-Rue. Like both of them together. I know it's a mouthful, but we can think of nicknames. Both of them were so important to your life."

Katniss wiped at an unexpected tear. "I like it."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

He smiled.

"You always get your way with me, Peeta. Do you know I do everything for you?"

"Sometimes it takes a little convincing, you stubborn woman." He chuckled. "I love you."

"I love you." She sat back and lifted her feet up onto the opposite chair. "More than I can ever show you."

"You're having my baby, Katniss. That's proof enough."

She nodded. "After her I don't want any more."

"Okay."

"Don't just say 'okay' like it's fine."

"But it is. A little girl I can dress up in ruffles and bows and show off to everyone. She's all we need."

"Don't you want a boy to carry on the Mellark name?"

"And why would I want that? If our daughter is anything like her mother, she'll probably end up insisting any man she marries to take _her_ name."

She smiled. "Well, then." She rubbed her stomach. "Haymitch said Annie and Pearl were fine. That they're planning on coming for a visit in a few months."

"We should call after supper."

"We should." Her face contracted in pain and she pressed a hand to her lower stomach.

Peeta started putting plates on the table. "Are you okay, sweetheart?"

"Just having those false contractions again."

"Are you sure they're not real?"

"I've still got a few weeks. And they're not that strong."

"Maybe we got the calculations wrong. Or maybe the baby wants to come early. It happens."

"And maybe it's too soon." She looked a little worried. "It's like the last time. They're not real, Peeta. I'm fine."

"Just—"

She grabbed his arm. "Stop. Just stop. I'm fine. _We're_ fine."

"You're sure?"

"Yeah, I'm sure."

Peeta let out a long breath and then pressed a kiss to her lips. "Keep me informed."

"Like I wouldn't." She smiled.

He kissed her again.

* * *

"No, please." Katniss woke herself up when she said it. She panted and looked around the dark room. Peeta was still asleep beside her. She brushed a hand down his cheek.

He mumbled something and turned his face away.

The dream started to fade. She didn't even remember now what it was, but the feeling was still there. The feeling of loneliness. She moved closer to her husband and draped her arm over him.

His hand came up to rest on her stomach. "You okay?" he asked.

She was sure he was still asleep, but she answered anyway. "Yeah."

His arm came around her and he pressed his lips to hers.

"Peeta?"

"Katniss?"

"I'm scared."

His eyes opened. "Of what?"

"Everything." She said softly. "Hold me tighter."

He tightened his grip on her. "I'm here, Katniss."

"Don't ever leave me." She begged.

"What is all this about?"

"I'm scared." She said again.

He rubbed her back. "I'm here. It's okay."

She clutched at him. "I don't… I can't…" She sat up suddenly gasping for air.

He sat up beside her. "Katniss?"

"I can't breathe."

"Relax." He rubbed her back. "It's okay. Relax."

Her breathing eventually went back to normal. She turned her head. "I had a nightmare."

"About what?"

"I can't remember. I just feel like you went away from me. I don't know why."

"Better now?"

She nodded. "The baby, too. But I think I scared her as much as I scared myself." She took his hand and placed it on her stomach. "Do you feel her? Every time I feel her move… "

He kissed her. "Yeah." He rested his forehead against hers. "It's life renewed after so much loss."

"I'm sorry I fought for so long."

"No. The time wasn't right before." He pulled her back down on the bed. "Let's try to get back to sleep."

"Okay."

Sleep came easily for him, but not so much for her. She tried, but even though she was accepting this and was now starting to feel excited about the birth of her daughter in just a few weeks, she was still scared.


	17. Chapter 17

When the sky started to lighten on the horizon, she finally gave up on sleep and went downstairs. She started tea and stood at the sink watching the sunrise. As she was staring out the window, she felt Peeta's arms wrap around her from behind.

He asked softly in her ear, "Is there enough of that tea for me?"

"Mm-hm." She leaned back against him.

"You okay?" he kissed her neck.

"Yeah, I'm fine. My back hurts."

He rubbed her back. "You sit down. I'll finish the tea."

"You sure?"

He kissed her cheek. "Go sit. I'll make tea and I'll start some cinnamon rolls. How does that sound?"

She smiled. "Sounds great." She pressed a kiss to his mouth before walking into the living room.

The pain in her back moved around to her stomach. She suppressed a groan. After a while it passed and she sat back.

"Are you okay?"

She looked up. "I think I just had a contraction."

"Did your water break?"

"Not yet. It could be nothing."

"You said that last night."

"We'll just keep an eye on it." She took the offered cup of tea from him. "Hazelle said all her pregnancies were different, but that Gale was the longest. Annie said Finn took a while, too. They both said the first might take longer."

"So…" He reached out his hand and placed it on her stomach. "We might be able to hold our daughter tomorrow?"

She put her hand on top of his. "Yes." Her voice trembled.

"It'll be okay, sweetheart."

"I sure hope so." She sipped her tea and patted his hand. "I'm so scared."

"I know." He gathered her to him, sipping from his own cup. "You're okay with Primrose-Rue?"

"Yes. As long as I can pick the next name."

"So does that mean…?"

"Maybe in a few years. I liked having a younger sister. Did you like having brothers?"

"I guess." He said softly. "She was cruel to all of us. It seemed like she targeted me more, though." He kissed her temple. "But I'd have a whole houseful if you'd let me."

"I know you would."

"You still want those cinnamon rolls?"

"No, I want to stay like this for a while longer. Quiet, alone. We won't be much longer."

"What do you think about that?"

"I don't know." She swallowed. "I just want this all to be over with."

"I just want to hold her. Argue about who she looks like."

Katniss chuckled, "Yeah."

"Who do you think she'll look like?"

"Haymitch."

They both laughed.

"If she looks like Haymitch, we're all in a lot of trouble. Hazelle won't stand for it." Peeta said, still laughing.

"Oh, he'd be so dead." She turned. "And what about me?"

"What about you, sweetheart?"

"If our daughter looks like Haymitch." She teased.

"I'd love her. And you. I'll always love you. One night of stupidity wouldn't change that." He chuckled in her ear. "But I know you wouldn't have had much opportunity."

"And what makes you think that?"

"Hazelle is almost always with Haymitch. And when she's not, I'm home."

"There have been a few times when he and I were alone."

"So should I be scared?"

"No, honey, I don't think so."

He kissed her neck. "You never call me honey."

"Well, I just felt like it." She finished off her tea. "It feels odd to call you honey or baby or dear. You're just Peeta. You're _my_ Peeta. And I love you more than anything."

"I love you, too." He kissed her under her ear. "Do you want anything or need anything?"

"Just hold me." She snuggled close. "I didn't sleep well last night."

"I'm sorry. You can sleep now. I have nothing else to do today. I'll hold you."

"I don't know if I can." She struggled to stand up. "I have to pee. I hate being pregnant."

He chuckled. "Not long now, sweetheart."

She wondered off to the bathroom.

Peeta headed toward the kitchen with the tea mugs.

Katniss called, "So, I think this is really happening."

He walked toward the bathroom. "Are you sure?"

"Pretty sure, yeah." She opened the bathroom door. "I'm having another contraction." She held her stomach and leaned against the door frame.

"Come on." He supported her and walked with her back toward the couch. He looked at the clock. "About a half hour, I guess."

"Hm?" she asked as she came out of it.

"In between. It was about a half hour."

"Right."

"Do you want me to get Hazelle or call the doctor?"

"We should call the doctor, just to be sure."

"Okay." He went into the office and made the call. He explained about the situation and was told by the doctor to keep an eye on the time in between and to call again when they were closer. Just what they already knew, but it was good to be reminded.

He walked back in and told Katniss what her doctor had said.

"So now we wait." She said.

"Seems like it. Let's do something. We could play cards."

She smiled. "Could you maybe just hold me some more?"

"Yeah, of course. Come here." He pulled her against him.

She dozed for a while until she was hit with another contraction. Peeta murmured in her ear, encouraging her to breathe and relax.

When it passed, Peeta said, "About 27 minutes."

"Okay." Katniss sighed against him. "You don't have to babysit me, you know."

"But I want to be here." He kissed under her hear. "I love you."

For the next several hours, there was no progress. The contractions remained the same distance apart. Katniss encouraged Peeta to eat something, despite not feeling up to eating herself.

"But I am thirsty."

He poured her a glass of water. "I want you to eat something. You haven't all day."

"I know."

"I'll make you something."

"I can't believe this isn't moving any faster."

"You said it might take a while." He headed toward the kitchen. "I heat up some of that squirrel."

"I wonder if Annie knows any tips to move this along." She pushed herself up off the couch and waddled into the study.

"Cresta-Hawthorne residence." Finn said when he answered.

Katniss chuckled. "Hey, Finn."

"Hey, Katniss. How's it going?"

"Oh, it's going. Is your mom around?"

"She's up with Pearl. I'll go get her. Here's Dad."

"Hello there, Catnip." Gale said on the other end.

"Hey, Gale. How's that baby?"

"Growing like a weed. Maggie's a little jealous."

"Oh, I bet. Give her an extra hug for me."

"Is everything okay?" he asked.

"Yeah, I just wanted some pregnancy advice from your wife."

"She's a good resource having done it three times."

"Yep."

"And here she is."

"Katniss?" Annie's soft voice came through the phone.

She sighed. "Annie, hi. How is Pearl?"

"Exhausting. Be prepared." She chuckled.

"But a good exhausting, right?" She rubbed her stomach.

"A very good exhausting."

"Good." She nodded, though she knew Annie couldn't see. "So the reason I called…I'm having contractions."

"That's great. How far apart?"

"About a half hour apart and have been since this morning. So, do you know of any way to speed it up?"

"Hazelle told me sex."

"Well, that's kind of the last thing on my mind right now." Katniss said with an embarrassed laugh.

"I know it seems like it, but it actually helped with Mags. But, you can walk around, that helps just as well. It worked with Finn."

"What about Pearl?"

"She was ready to meet us, so I didn't need any of those tricks."

"Well, thank you."

"I hope something helps. And keep yourself hydrated."

"Okay. Thanks, Annie."

"Any time. And let us know when that little girl is here so we can plan a trip. I want our girls to be best friends. And of course Pearl needs to meet her family."

"We will. Peeta will. I'm sure he'll want to call everyone. Even in the middle of the night."

"We wouldn't mind that."

"No, I'll make sure he knows better. You've got a little one. Bye, Annie."

"Bye. Take care of yourself."

"I will." She walked into the kitchen and started pacing.

"What are you doing?" her husband asked as he watched her.

"Walking. Annie said it might work."

"Good. I really, really just want to hold her." Peeta said giddily.

She laughed. "I like to see you like this. You're like a little boy getting the thing you want most in the world."

"It _is_ the thing I want most in the world, sweetheart."

There was a knock on the door then. Katniss went to answer it.

"Looking good." Haymitch said fondly as he kissed the young woman's cheek and patted her stomach.

"Don't feel good." She was then hit with another contraction.

"What's happening?"

"Just in labor. No big deal." She said through her teeth.

"Shouldn't you be with the doctor?" he asked, concerned.

The pain passed. "They're too far apart." She led him into the kitchen. "And they have been all morning." She told her husband. "Just had another one."

He looked at the clock. "Well, you've gained five minutes. Keep walking."

She nodded. She'd already started per pacing back up.

Haymitch watched her for a while and then said, "Hazelle sent me over to invite you to supper tonight."

"No." Katniss said. "I don't think that's a good idea."

"Maybe if we're lucky, by supper time we'll be having a baby." Peeta said.

"Or, I could still be walking."

"Is there no other option?"

"Nothing that sounds appealing right now."

Haymitch asked. "Are you going to be okay?"

"It's just a baby, Haymitch." Katniss said. "I'll be fine. Your wife had four of them and is still kicking." She grabbed her stomach. "Speaking of kicking. Calm down in there, Prue."

"Prue?" Haymitch asked.

"I like that." Peeta told his wife. He turned back to his old mentor. "Primrose-Rue. It's what we're naming her. Prue is her nickname, I suppose."

Katniss nodded and continued her circuit back and forth across the room. She rubbed her stomach. "Maybe you should just come out a little faster, baby girl."

"Can I get you anything or do anything?" Haymitch asked awkwardly.

"Not unless you have some magical way to transport her out of me." Katniss said.

"No. Sorry."

"Then I don't think you can help me much. Tell Hazelle thanks, but no thanks."

"Okay." He left without another word.

Peeta shook his head. He passed his wife a piece of leftover squirrel.

Katniss nibbled as she walked.

"So what was that other suggestion?" he asked, eating his own bit of squirrel.

"I'm not telling. Because I'm not feeling it and I know you'll try to convince me. And probably succeed."

"Well, if it could make her come sooner…"

She sighed, "Sex."

He smiled.

"No."

"But, sweetheart—"

"Peeta, I'm feeling very unsexy right now."

"But you're so beautiful."

"Not helping." She glared at him and tossed the bone in Buttercup's bowl. "Mm, another one." She rubbed her stomach.

He looked at the clock. "Well, about 20 minutes now. Getting closer." He walked over and rubbed her stomach.

"I want her here already."

"Me too."

"I love you. But I'll show you that way some other time."

"You're showing me right now." He kissed her softly. "Are you okay?"

She nodded. "Maybe we should call the doctor."

"Do you feel okay?"

"Yeah, but I feel like it's almost time and I want to be prepared."

"You sure?"

"Might as well get her here. And call my mother to let her know." She made her way slowly up the stairs.

He hurried after her, supporting her as she went along.


	18. Chapter 18

Peeta paced the room in the early morning light with his daughter in his arms. She stared up at him with eyes as blue as his own. He kissed her forehead. She started to fuss.

"Shh. You're okay, Prue. Primrose-Rue. That's your name. Primrose was your mother's sister. And Rue was a very brave girl who helped keep Mama alive. It's a very long story and we'll tell you all about it when you're old enough."

Katniss spoke softly, "Not for a very long time."

He smiled at her. "No, we'll let her just be our little Prue for as long as possible." He kissed her tiny forehead again. "I think she's hungry."

"I guess so." Katniss took her.

"But I don't want to let her go."

She said nothing as she took the baby from him.

He watched for a while as his wife fed their daughter. He asked quietly, "Do you need anything?"

She shook her head, not taking her eyes off the tiny person in her arms. "I'm sorry." She said, barely above a whisper.

"What? Why are you apologizing?"

"Because I thought I didn't want her. But how could I not? She's so perfect."

"Yeah."

"Prue. Primrose-Rue. Our perfect little girl. She's you made over."

He smiled and kissed her temple. "Yeah. Good thing, too. If she had come out looking like Haymitch…"

She laughed and raised her eyes. "I love you."

"And I love you." He kissed her lips. "Both of you." He kissed Prue's head. "You want me to call your mother?"

"Yes. I bet she fell asleep by the phone."

"I bet she did." He kissed her once more and went to make the call.

"Am I a grandma?" Iris asked as she picked up the phone.

Peeta laughed. "Yes, Iris. And she's beautiful. Ten fingers. Ten toes. Perfect little angel."

"Have you picked a name yet?"

"Primrose-Rue." He said softly. "We're calling her Prue for short."

He heard her breath catch. Her voice was thick when she said, "I'm sure they would both appreciate that."

"Yeah."

"Well, I'm going to be on the first train I can get, if that's okay."

"That's perfectly fine. Katniss can't wait to see you. And Prue as well."

"Prue." She said softly. "I can't wait to see all of you. You take good care of those girls, Peeta."

"I will, Iris, I promise. And let me know when you'll be here so I can meet you at the station."

"You don't have to do that?"

"Well, I may want to bring my new daughter on her first outing."

"You shouldn't do that, Peeta." She scolded kindly.

"Just let us know." He hung up the phone and then hurried back up to his bedroom.

Katniss stood over the bassinet, murmuring to the baby and rubbing her small tummy.

Peeta wrapped his arms around her and rested his chin on her shoulder. "Your mother is very excited and will be on the first train here she can get on. She'll let us know when for sure."

"Good." She leaned back against him. "We've been advised by everyone that knows to sleep while we can. And I am exhausted. So let's get some sleep before our neighbors are around and come visit."

"But I don't want to stop looking at her."

"I don't either. But if we want to stay sane, we need sleep."

He kissed her cheek. "Okay."

They climbed into bed. Katniss was asleep almost instantly. Peeta stayed awake, watching her sleep, combing his fingers through her hair. His wife. Sometimes it struck him just how amazingly lucky he was to have her after all that he had done. But here she was, in his arms, now officially the mother of his daughter. Beautiful. Perfect. His. He didn't even have to ask in this moment if it was real or not. He knew it was. And for once, they were completely happy.

* * *

Peeta kissed her forehead. "Katniss."

She mumbled, "Does she need me?"

"No, she's fine for the moment. Haymitch and Hazelle are here, though. You want me to just bring her down and let you rest?"

"Bring her down and I'll be behind you." She rolled over. "She'll need to be fed soon."

He rubbed her back and then picked Prue up out of her bassinet beside the bed. She fussed a little, but he quieted her. "It's okay, sweetie. We're going to see Haymitch and Hazelle. They're so excited to meet you."

She stared at him with her big, blue eyes. He smiled and kissed her cheek.

Haymitch stood when they entered the room.

Peeta passed the small bundle in his arms over to his old mentor.

The older man stood awkwardly a moment as the baby started to fuss.

Her father rubbed a finger over her cheek. "Shh. This is Haymitch, Prue. He's usually a pretty good guy. You're safe with him. And Daddy's right here."

"She's beautiful." Haymitch breathed. "Hey, there, Prue." He looked askance at the younger man before he carried the baby over to his wife.

Hazelle looked at her. "She's the spitting image of her daddy."

"Well, thank you." He said with a proud grin. "I think she looks a lot like her mama, though."

"She's more you." Katniss said, coming down the stairs.

At the sound of her mother's voice, Prue started crying again.

"She's hungry." She said, taking the baby from Haymitch. "We'll be right back." She disappeared into the study and closed the door behind her.

"Isn't she just the greatest?" Peeta asked anxiously.

"She's amazing." Hazelle said.

Haymitch nodded. "Posy wanted to come over, but we sent her off to school. She might come over this afternoon, if that's okay."

"It's fine."

They chatted for a while, Hazelle telling them stories about her children's first days. The phone rang in the study and Peeta heard Katniss answer. He was so attuned to her voice. He just listened to the murmur of it while trying to pay attention to his friends' conversation.

Katniss came in a short time later and handed Prue back to Haymitch. "That was my mother. Her train will get here early in the morning. She said not to drag yourself out of bed to meet her. She knows how to get here." She sat on Peeta's lap. "And I don't want you to either."

He kissed her cheek. "Whatever you say, dear."

"You better say that." She smiled and kissed him.

He laughed. "Did you call Gale and Annie?"

"Not yet. They have three other people to get here, so I'm not going to push them."

"And I don't want to be bombarded with people just yet."

"Yeah." She rested her head on his shoulder. She asked her friends, "So what do you think?"

Haymitch smiled, "She's gorgeous, sweetheart." He kissed the baby he held and then passed her over to his wife.

"Yes." Hazelle said, looking down at the baby. "Do you want or need anything?"

"I think we have everything." Peeta said. He rubbed Katniss's back. "Thank you, though."

Hazelle looked at her husband. He nodded and they both stood. She passed the girl to her mother.

"Tell Posy she can come over when she gets home." Katniss said, standing up and walking with them to the door.

Once they were alone again, they sat together on the couch. Peeta gathered Katniss close to his chest.

"I love you." She said.

"Which of us are you talking to?" her husband asked, kissing her under her hear.

"Both of you." She turned her head and caught his lips.

He smiled and rested his head against hers. "And I love you both, too."

Prue let out a sigh.

"I guess she's agreeing." Peeta said with a chuckle.

"Yeah."

* * *

Iris and Katniss sat at the kitchen table drinking tea. They had just put Prue to bed. Peeta decided to go to the bakery for a while. He claimed to be neglecting it and worried about making Vick to all the work. Katniss figured he just wanted her to have some time with her mother.

"Are you okay with the name?" she asked, tracing her finger around the rim of her tea cup.

"Why wouldn't I be? It's perfect. And Prim…" Her voice trailed off.

Katniss patted her hand. "I miss her, too. And I'm glad Peeta chose the name."

"And planted the primroses around your house." She added.

"Yeah." She got up. "I need to start supper."

"You sit down. I didn't just come here to see you. I came to take care of you. You still have a lot of healing to do and you have to rest for that to happen."

"Mother!" Katniss protested.

"Don't you 'Mother' me, Katniss." She scolded. She took her daughter by the shoulders and gently sat her down. "I know my way around a kitchen."

"Thanks, Mom."

She smiled and kissed the top of her daughter's head. "Any time." She went to work pulling things out of the cabinets.

"There's a lot of game in the freezer. I stocked up before I got too far along."

Iris rummaged in the freezer and found several small birds. "I can fry these up tomorrow." She said as she put them in a bowl and filled it with water and salt. She went back to the freezer and took out some venison that had been cubed. "Stew?" She asked.

"That works."

They talked as Iris chopped vegetables.

"So how is Alexander?"

"He's fine." She blushed.

"Just fine?" Katniss teased.

"I never thought I'd love anyone after your father."

"I know."

She smiled. "You know, your daddy thought the sun rose and set with you. Peeta reminds me a lot of him. He's calm, steady. Talented."

"Yeah."

"If Alexander and I were married…"

"I think that would be great, Mom."

"Really? I don't want you to think that I was forgetting about your dad."

"I know you'd never forget about him. But I think he'd like Alexander for you. And he only ever wanted you to be happy."

"I know."

"So you should marry him." Katniss stood. "I need to check on Prue."

"Don't over-do yourself, Katniss."

"I won't, Mom." She walked toward the stairs and was a few steps up when there was a knock on the front door. She paused.

"I'll get it." Her mother called. She opened the door to find Finn standing there anxiously.

"Hello, Mrs. Everdeen." He said with a smile.

"Well, hello, Finn." She smiled at his parents standing behind, each holding a baby. "And the rest of the Hawthorne gang. Come in. Katniss has been anxious for your arrival." She stepped off to the side and the family filtered in.

"Did you see my new sister?" Finn asked.

Gale held her out. "Pearl." He said with a smile as broad as Peeta's when he first showed her Prue after her arrival.

"Well, isn't she precious? She and her brother share a lot of their mother's features." She tickled Mags's cheek. "And you look like your father."

The little girl smiled shyly and pressed her face into Annie's neck.

Katniss came down the stairs with Prue. "Baby comparison time." She said as she walked over to her friend.

The two ooh'd and ah'd over their children. Finn stood close and looked over their shoulders.

Katniss lightly shoved his shoulder. "What are you thinking, kid?" she asked.

"She's really pretty." He said, gesturing to Prue. "But my sister's prettier."

She laughed and draped her arm over his shoulder. "Just don't tell Peeta, all right?"

"Tell Peeta what?" the man in question asked as he walked into the room. He hugged Annie and kissed Maggie's cheek.

Finn said, "Nothing. Did you see my new sister?"

"I'll get to her in a minute." Peeta ruffled the boy's hair. "My goodness, you're getting big." He asked Gale, "What are you feeding him?"

Gale laughed. "Well, his dad was pretty tall, so we'll have to see where it stops."

"You're a little taller, if that helps anything." Annie said, slipping her hand into his.

"Yeah?" He kissed her quickly. "Anyway. Look at my daughter. I got an eyeful of yours already."

"Daddy." Maggie said, reaching for him.

Peeta took Pearl as Gale took his older daughter in his arms and gathered her close. "Someone's still a little jealous." He kissed her temple.

"Well, it happens." Iris said. "Katniss threw some horrible fits when Prim was born."

"I was four." Katniss argued. "I was used to getting all the attention." She squeezed Finn around the shoulders. "Eleven years is a little different, though, huh?"

He smiled, "Yeah, a little." He looked at his mother.

A conflicted look passed over her face. She kissed her son's forehead. "I need some air. Please excuse me." She left the house.

"She doesn't always like to be reminded." The boy said. "Can I go back over to hang out with Posy?"

"Sure." Gale said.

He went out.

"I guess I'm not good enough anymore." Katniss called after him. She looked to her friend. "You think Annie would mind some company?"

"I don't know. She gets this way. Her madness and depression are still there. She just learned to hide it. But after these two…"

Katniss gave Prue to her mother. "I'll go talk to her."

She found Annie at the side of the house, crouched with her hands over her ears. Her shoulders shook.

Katniss crouched beside her. "You okay?"

Annie jumped and stood. She took a few steps back. "They're coming back." She said. "The voices. I was good for a while. But when Maggie was born they came back. I made them go away again. Until Pearl." She swallowed and whipped at her eyes. "I miss Finnick. And I feel like I'm just pretending with Gale."

Katniss didn't know what to say.

"The stress of my lies…" She leaned against the wall. "I love him, I do. I love our girls. I love how much Finn adores him. I just don't love him now as much as I love Finnick. It's not fair to anyone, especially not to him."

"Annie. You are a very strong woman to have made it through everything. I know it's hard. But you said it yourself, you love Gale. Maybe one day you _will_ love him the way you love Finnick. You were with him for five years. Maybe when you've been with Gale longer, it will even out."

She nodded. "Maybe."

"And you're working on this, right?"

"Yeah. I think that's where it all comes from. I pushed it all away when I married Gale and it's starting to become too much, so it leaks out."

"I know it doesn't go away completely. I still have nightmares. They got worse during my pregnancy, so I know how that is. Peeta still sometimes wants to kill me, so that'll all be something to explain to Prue when she's older. But we go on. Because it's what Finnick and Prim would have expected."

Annie nodded. "Yeah."

"And our babies are proof of it too." She put an arm around her friend's shoulders. "So let's go back in there and remind ourselves why we're still here."


	19. Epilogue

"Mama, are you okay?" Prue asked from outside the bathroom.

"Yes, sweetie." Katniss called as she hoisted herself up off the floor. "Be right out." She swished some mouthwash around her mouth and then exited the bathroom. She picked her daughter up to rest on her hip. "We need to have a talk." She walked into the living room and sat her down on the couch.

"What kind of talk, Mama?" She asked.

Katniss kneeled down in front of her. "I want to tell you something."

The girl's face brightened. "What?"

"You know how Maggie is Pearl's big sister?"

She nodded.

"Well, what would you think about being like Maggie?"

"Me a big sister?"

"Yeah. Well, you're going to be. Mama is going to have a baby."

Prue smiled. "That's fantastic."

Katniss laughed. "Such a big word such a little girl."

"Daddy told me that word."

"Daddy. Do you think we should tell him about the baby?"

"He might be sad if we don't."

"I'm sure. So, should we go to the bakery?"

"Can I tell him?" She stood up and looked at her mother expectantly. "Please, Mama?"

"Of course, my beautiful little Primrose-Rue." She swung the girl up into her arms and they headed out the door.

Hazelle bent over her garden at the front of her house.

"Hi, Hazelle!" Prue called.

"Hello, Prue." She waved and then turned back to her gardening.

"Mama, can we tell Grandma and Grandpa?"

"When we get home, we can. But Daddy needs to be told first." She put the girl down. "You're getting heavy."

She giggled and ran ahead.

Katniss laughed and ran up behind her, gathering Prue in her arms and tickling her before letting her go. She chased the little girl up to the bakery.

Prue pressed her face to the front window. "Daddy's cakes are so pretty." She said.

"They are." Katniss smoothed her hand over her daughter's dark hair. "But you're prettier."  
"Thank you, Mama." She said with a proud smile.

Peeta waved through the window when he noticed them. He opened the door and peeked out. "You only get a cookie if you come inside."

Prue squealed and ran up to her father who swung her up into his arms. He paused to kiss Katniss before going inside. He sat Prue down at the table he used to consult about cakes. He walked behind the counter and plucked three cookies off the tray. He handed one to his daughter and another to his wife and then nibbled his own.

"So what brings my two lovely ladies here this afternoon?" He sat down beside Prue and pulled Katniss into his lap.

"Mama's having a baby." Prue said around a mouthful of cookie.

Peeta's gaze drifted to his wife. "Seriously?"

She nodded. "I know you've wanted it for a while."

"I have. But, I mean, we haven't really been trying."

"Well, we haven't been trying _not_ to." She sat her cookie on the table and cupped his face. "What do you say?"

"When? I mean how far along?"

"Just a couple months." She kissed him.

He smiled. "That's fantastic."

She laughed. "That's what Prue said."

"Did you, now?" He looked at his daughter. "Are you excited?"

She nodded. "Can I have another cookie?"

"Here, eat the rest of mine." Katniss passed her cookie over. "Daddy and I love you very much, Prue. You know that, right?"

She smiled. "I know. I love you, too, Mama. And I love you, Daddy."

Peeta pressed a kiss to Katniss's neck. He whispered. "I love you."

She turned and kissed him.

The bell over the door dinged as it opened and a customer walked in.

She kissed him again before she got off his lap.

* * *

"I don't want to go to sleep." Prue protested.

"But you're going to sleep anyway." Her father said. "And you get to sleep in the guest room tonight."

"Because Mama's having the baby upstairs?"

"Yes. In a few hours, you'll have a baby brother."

"Will you wake me up when it happens?"

"Yes, dear, I will. Now close your eyes."

She did.

He started singing, "Deep in the meadow, under the willow."

She was asleep before he was done with the first verse. He kissed her forehead and then hurried back up the stairs to his wife.

* * *

"So what is this name you've been keeping to yourself?" Peeta asked as he watched his wife feed their new son.

Katniss smiled at him. "Well, I've known since we learned he was a boy that I wanted to name him for my father. Caleb. But I wanted something good to go with it. I've been playing around with other names to find one that would go with it perfectly."

"So what did you finally come up with?"

"Cinna." She swallowed. "Caleb Cinna. What do you think?"

He smiled and kissed her. "Perfect."

She smiled, "I'm glad you think so."

"We need to wake Prue. She asked me to wake her when he got here."

"Then go get her. He's almost done."

He kissed her again before he got out of the bed.

Prue rubbed her eyes as she walked into the room in front of her father. She climbed up onto the bed and looked over at the baby. She stared at him for a while. He stared back.

"His eyes are like yours, Mama." She breathed. "He's pretty. Can boys be pretty?" she said around a yawn.

"Yes, sweetheart, I believe so." Katniss smoothed down her sleep-mussed hair. "You want to sleep in here the rest of the night?"

"Yes, please." She snuggled down at her mother's side and was instantly back asleep.

Peeta stretched out on her other side. "Is he still awake?"

"Not for much longer. Those little eyelids are drooping." She kissed him. "Sleep, CC. Mama and Daddy are right here when you need us."

Peeta took the boy from her and kissed him. "Just a few feet away, in fact." He placed the boy in the bassinet. He got back in bed beside his wife. "CC, huh?"

"I guess I should have let you pick the nickname since I picked Prue's."

He kissed her. "I don't care. I like it. And Caleb Cinna seemed a bit of a mouthful to Prue when she said it earlier."

"Prue and CC. Our beautiful children."

"Katniss?"

"Hm?"

"You love me. Real or not real?"

"Peeta," she sighed, "I love you so much more every year we're together."

"Real for me, too." He kissed her again. "Rest, sweetheart."

She yawned. Her eyes drifted closed. "We'll call everyone first thing."

"Yeah." He kissed her cheek. "Goodnight."

"Mm."

**Author's Note:**

> So what do you think? Leave me a comment or come talk to me on Tumblr (booksrockmyface).
> 
> And if you notice, Peeta calls Katniss "sweetheart." In my mind he started doing it as a joke and it kind of became his endearment of choice.


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